Thursday, May 31, 2007

MY Stupid State - dotcom

You know how when you're searching for an available domain name and the registration service, be it Network Solutions or GoDaddy or wherever you prefer, comes back with, "That name is not available" and then they offer you a bunch of crappy alternatives, many of them beginning with "My"?

Well, that's what happened when the State of Florida didn't jump on "" years ago and got stuck with "" Anytime you see a business with a domain name like, you can bet that business was way late to the game.

Since 2003, all new license plates in the state have borne this stupid domain name on them. I just received one of these abominations in the mail yesterday, as the state attempts to phase out all the older, better standard plates, the ones that said "Florida" and didn't have giant cartoon oranges on them. They had one orange, yes, but it wasn't fluorescent. They're purposely forcing me by their deliberately inept design to choose one of the more expensive specialty plates, like this embarrassment, as if being the Golf Capital of the World was something to be proud of. Rock on, silhouetted retiree golf addict.

When these new standard plates started appearing on the road and I found out that eventually we'd all have to have one, I got real pissed and sent a letter to the head of these things in my state.

"Who is responsible for the hideous and inexcusable standard Florida license plate design? Do I have to have this piece of crap on my car? Of particular offense is the name at the top. This is not progressive. It is ridiculous.

I can't tell you how bad this makes our state look. It is beyond stupid.


Carl A. Ford, Director of the Division of Motor Vehicles, wrote me back.

We regret you are not pleased with the design of Florida's license plate. The department initiated a new design for the standard Florida license plate in 2003. The Department of Agriculture in conjunction with the Florida Citrus Association recommended the new design that depicts two Florida oranges with leaves and orange bl
ossoms. The additional on the license plate is to broaden awareness to a web site that has links to all state of Florida government services. The website provides citizens greater and more convenient access to state government.

He then went on to point me to the URL where I can find a bunch of expensive alternative plates, like Save the Sea Turtles and Share the Road with a Biker and Don't Beat Your Kids and John Lennon is Dead and a hundred other special interest plates.

I just thought it would be nice to have a simple standard plate free of promotion of a stupid domain name. Like this one.

Or this one.

And likely 47 other decent designs that don't include a "MY" domain name.


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  • other alternatives:

    “Slow down in the everglades asshole or you might hit a manatee.”

    “More people die each year here from lightening strikes than shark attacks, so come on down!”

    “Florida–we’ve got that hurricane evacuation thing down to a science.”

    (And yes, I’m still sticking with my own choice for NJ here:

    “NJ. Everything you expected–and less.”

    By Blogger Make the logo bigger, at May 31, 2007 at 6:48 PM  

  • Just want to drop a note and introduce you to It is a new exchange where you can sell your domains at 2% commission.

    Say goodbye to 10% commission in domain sales. Visit

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at May 31, 2007 at 8:05 PM  

  • Hey, Anon!

    Thanks for posting - and further illustrating my point about being late to the dotcom reservation. You URL begins with "i" - which is just as bad as "my" or "e."

    Also, if you're going to play the corporate blogging game in an attempt to get traffic to your site, keep these simple rules in mind.

    Don't post anonymously.
    Say something relevant to the post in your comment.
    Don't just troll for related tags and then randomly paste a link to your site.
    If you have to post your URL, learn some simple html and make it a text link.

    Better luck next time, iStockIdiot. I'm not going to your dumb website. I urge all readers to avoid it as well.

    By Blogger Jetpacks, at May 31, 2007 at 10:54 PM  

  • Do you only have one standard plate? That sucks... especially with what it looks like.

    If I'm not mistaken, VA has about 4 or 5 standard plates you can choose from without paying extra. It's really nice.

    By Blogger Thinking In Vain, at June 1, 2007 at 8:32 AM  

  • Yeah, just one standard plate. And I can't find one among all of these that I'd put on my car.

    By Blogger Jetpacks, at June 1, 2007 at 12:54 PM  

  • Oh god, they're all cartoons...

    By Blogger Thinking In Vain, at June 1, 2007 at 1:55 PM  

  • About 10 years ago Michigan came out with a commemorative Model T plate that was in hideous beige and blue tones.

    We were driving with a family friend who is high up in the auto industry and I (at age 13) of course go off about how ugly they are. Long pause. "I was on the committee for those plates." Oh. ha. First, but not last, memorable foot in mouth.

    By Anonymous Catch Up Lady, at June 4, 2007 at 1:37 PM  

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