Wednesday, March 07, 2012

Books Where You Actually Turned the Pages Made from Real Paper

I was looking around for something to read, bored out of my mind by some Sinclair Lewis novel I downloaded for free from the Gutenberg Project, when I noticed that someone in the house had removed an old Time-Life book from the bookshelf in the dining room so they might employ it as a mousepad for some murderous game played on a laptop while sitting on the couch eating Goldfish and watching Family Guy. That's the level of respect we have for books these days, They're mousepads. These old Time-Life books, a series called "The Old West", belonged to my wife's father, and they've done nothing but collect dust since the turn of the century and well before that, I'm sure. And it was not with purposeful disrespect that the person in question decided it made a good mousepad, but a careful study of its smooth, leather-ish exterior determined it had the right reflective properties and gripping strength to be used for something. What are those stupid decorations in the dining room all about? The things with the paper inside them that look like perfect laptop mousepads?

And now I'm reading them. I feel like I'm getting the quality middle-school education I carelessly neglected all those years ago, too concerned was I with skipping class and trying to make girls pay attention to me. And the books are full of pictures, too, which is perfect for a wandering mind like mine. Here's the commercial that advertised this expensive set of volumes when it was newish.

Thank you, spoiled 21st Century child who thought this made the perfect mousepad for your gaming pleasure. Alas, I was just like you when I was your age, and never would've thought these books were good for anything, unless someone had told me they had pictures of naked Native Americans in them.

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  • I read them when i was a kid. Great stuff. All those Time Life books were great. My dad sold them all for a nickel apiece at a yard sale after I joined the Air Force. Ass!

    By Anonymous Rob Hatfield, at March 8, 2012 at 1:17 PM  

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