Thursday, August 07, 2008

Now That's One Powerful Lawyer

A few posts back, I was laughing at my local Personal Injury Attorney Pages Yellow Pages, one of the endless editions landing on my driveway throughout the year. So I was sort of surprised to find another Yellow Pages on my drive this evening upon returning from work. Even more surprised was I to find that this was also from Verizon, as was the one last week. It even included the exact same magnet ad for an Orlando personal injury attorney affixed to the front. Was this some error? Did I accidentally get a duplicate Yellow Pages? Did the delivery people simply screw up?
No. It is identical in every way....except for one tiny detail.

I'm guessing Attorney Peircy J. Stakelum didn't like his goofy stare-at-the-ceiling look on the first magnet. Did he threaten a lawsuit if the error wasn't corrected? We now have a new Piercy J. Stakelum magnet, only now he looks like the kind of lawyer who would not hesitate to sue Verizon for screwing up his image.

You can not imagine the personal pain and suffering my client has endured. It is the least Verizon can do to begin to restore Mr. Stakelum's besmirched character, as he is at risk of becoming the butt of every lawyer joke not just in this fine city, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, but of the blogosphere as well!

Compare the two magnets below, with corrected Piercy on the right. I say, "Nice job, dude." Stick it to Verizon . Maybe they'll stop delivering these instant recyclables to my home if they keep losing money like this.

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  • Maybe it was supposed to be a lenticular magnet, also demonstrating his ability to hypnotize a jury.

    By Blogger HighJive, at August 7, 2008 at 8:02 PM  

  • “If i can fix my own eyes, imagine what I can do for you. I will get you the portrait you DESERVE!”

    By Blogger Make the logo bigger, at August 7, 2008 at 8:09 PM  

  • Next week, #3 version: he'll be looking down (presumably at piles of amassed contingency fees.) Responses will be tracked to determine which is the money shot. But copy? Set in stone. No way to outdo a line like "aggressive, experienced AND civil".

    By Blogger Ad Broad, oldest working writer in advertising, at August 7, 2008 at 10:29 PM  

  • Jeez, what a waste of money, manpower and paper. Way to go, lawyer dude. Way to go, Verizon.

    By Blogger Andy 3000, at August 7, 2008 at 11:16 PM  

  • Seriously? They reprinted/redelivered the entire f-ing phonebook just because the dude was rolling his eyes in the last picture? The man has the carbon footprint of a small country.

    By Anonymous mydogischelsea, at August 11, 2008 at 3:00 PM  

  • this guy is a scumbag...there is rumor he is a DEADBEAT DAD, with all that money for magnets, he should be out there supporting his kid. maybe those eyes are tear filled from all the inner turmoil and shame?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at September 3, 2008 at 12:40 AM  

  • I am an auto injury claims adjuster and have dealt with this dork several times. He is a total joke - every case I have handled where he is involved has been with about $120 - $400 damage to the vehicle he is client was "injured" in.


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at December 1, 2008 at 12:13 PM  

  • I googled his name and he was a contestant on Survivor in 2006?? I worked for this creep for 3 days and he fired me for no reason. Didn't even give me a chance to explain or improve my performance. He is all looks and no brains. Does not have a clue how his employees act. Don't ever work for him!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at April 19, 2009 at 4:27 PM  

  • hi,
    i just wanted to say how much i enjoy reading your blog. in a world full of spin, it's nice to get some fact-based analysis.
    keep up the good work.
    Auto Accident Attorney Houston

    By Blogger Nicholas Sullivan, at April 20, 2010 at 2:46 AM  

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