Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Crist Unleashes Too Little Too Late Banner Campaign

Charlie Crist, the man who hastily got married in an effort to disspell rumors that he was gay so that John McCain would consider him for his running mate before McCain so graciously gave America Sarah Palin, is in a futile battle with Marco Rubio, the Tea-Party favorite predicted to win a Senate seat for Florida today. Crist has been relatively silent in the ad department, while Rubio saturated the airwaves. Now Crist appears in banners, the day of the election, with these silly ads that attempt to make Rubio look like Fidel Castro and Che Guevara's best friend. Or at least make him look like some third-world terrorist and fugitive. All shadowy and blue, with disjointed font that suggests chaos. He's "too extreme." Vote for the tan white man. Kendrick Meek, my early favorite, is now a distant third. 

Crist, by nearly every account, is a career opportunist, always looking for the next rung on the ladder that will take him to his ultimate goal, his own private tanning bed in the Oval Office. After he loses today, I wonder what a guy who has spent his entire life in public office looking for the next opportunity is going to do. Reality show? Game-show host? "Who Wants to Be a Politician?" I wouldn't put it past him.

I'll head up to the polls at lunch and cast my worthless vote. I will ride my bike there. In flip-flops and shorts. Our polling station is the local Baptist church, and it is always a strange feeling to observe the old, Conservative white people who staff the polls observing me. And I know what they're thinking. But they are wrong. I am an independent. But if you ride your bike to the polling station in flip-flops in this neighborhood, you're clearly voting one way. Maybe I'll spray-paint the red Anarchy symbol on an old t-shirt just to freak them out a little more.

Crossposted to Radio Free Babylon.

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