Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Suicide Thwarted by Old Spice

Your grandma was easyThis two-page spread fairly jumps off the inside cover of this week's Rolling Stone. This is a 1968 photograph of the actress Faye Dunaway. She is sprawled out on a chair with her hand on a drink, eyes closed, dying fern symbolizing the imminent death of this poor, troubled soul while the Fires of Hell lick at the toes of her prepared for burial bare feet. The line above the strategically cut-off logo reads: "If Your Grandfather Hadn't Worn it, You Wouldnt Exist."

Notifying an already depressed woman that her grandma was a cheap tramp, lured to the bed of a guy just because he wore Old Spice, may not be the best way to cheer her up.

Or maybe I missed the point and this is your grandmother, and she's about to conceive your Mom or your Dad, making you possible someday, and you owe it to the dude who smells like Pinesol mixed with rotting wood, who builds a helluva fire.

As Scamp said, "What would I do if the Old Spice brief landed on my desk? Burst into tears, probably."

Continuing on their "Experience is Everything" theme, the Wieden & Kennedy kids have delivered this perplexing gem for a tired old brand. All colognes and aftershaves have always gone with the "Wear it and get some girly action" angle. W&K takes it to a new level*: Thank Old Spice for your very existence.

Most of this new cologne/bodyspray advertising is aimed at boys who don't even shave yet. I can attest that it is working. Every morning as we ride our bikes, we have to hold our breath as we pass the young swordsmen-in-training waiting for the schoolbus, a toxic cloud of mixed fragrances saturating the air around them. Can W&K make a dent in the Axe and Tag shares of the coveted middle-school masturbating demo? My guess is yes.

*"Takes it to a new level" is not to be considered an endorsement of "pushing the envelope" or any other "Agent of Change" cliche.

Previously in Old Spice

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4 Comments:

  • Yeah, when I saw the execution of this print ad, I thought, little disjointed from the bizarre satire of the TV let alone the website. Seemed too ‘fashiony‘ when compared to teh TV. Love the line though.

    Still, did the they change the Old Spice formula? Because if they didn't, it's still for sea captians who want to mask the smell of North Sea fishing nets or 43-year old guys with dickies who tour the country by Greyhound and wonder why they don't get dates.

    By Blogger Make the logo bigger, at January 17, 2007 at 10:38 AM  

  • thanks. now that fucking song's in my head, swirling around the image of my dead Irish grandparents doing it.

    By Blogger copyranter, at January 17, 2007 at 10:41 AM  

  • Oh, thanks copyranter. Now I have the image of your dead Irish grandparents doing it.

    By Anonymous Chuck Rampart, at January 17, 2007 at 4:17 PM  

  • they're trying to get a hot piece of that Axe ass

    By Blogger Slinky Redfoot, at January 21, 2007 at 11:00 PM  

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