Mark Zuckerberg Commented on Your Status

Zuckerberg's Free Ride

He was there to do a free commercial for the new profile pages on Facebook and talk about his eventual domination of the universe. Lesley Stahl came across as a sycophantic fangirl. It was interesting to watch as "60 Minutes" allowed him to burnish his image in the wake of "The Social Network," the film that portrays him as a heartless user.

(El click de pic para mas grande action)

The Head of Zuckerberg and the Voice of Napolitano

Found this old illustration on Flickr and repurposed it for today's events. (It gets much bigger.)

500 Million Friends

500 million people like this and if you don't you're probably just a socially retarded Harvard dropout.

You are Hungry or Tired and Now Everyone Knows It

I've heard that Facebook founder Mark ("The Dick") Zuckerberg boasts that Facebook is like a country, what with its millions of users and all. To me, it's more like a sleazy city full of pimps and crack whores. Or attention whores. I don't know. But pimps, for sure.


I just took the quiz, "What Kind of Facebook Hater Are You?" and my result was "Asshole Malcontent Who is Anti-Social and Hates When People Announce Mundane Shit." Take the Quiz!

And The Book of Faces Shall Devour Many

Future Man travels back in time, hoping to prevent the masses from being tricked by the devious plans of the diabolical mastermind Zuckerberg.

b-b-b-bigger

Meet Your New King

This is Mark Zuckerberg, boy genius and Emperor of Facebookistan. Recently he decreed that henceforth throughout his realm, everything you had was to be brought to his throne. There was much outcry throughout the land upon the Emperor's announcement, and so the Emperor, in his benevolence and wisdom, has sought to explain to the peasants just what exactly he meant by, "You own nothing and everything is mine!"

From the pen of one of the court scribes of His Excellence, Zuckerberg:

More than 175 million people use Facebook. If it were a country, it would be the sixth most populated country in the world. Our terms aren't just a document that protect our rights; it's the governing document for how the service is used by everyone across the world. Given its importance, we need to make sure the terms reflect the principles and values of the people using the service.

He is asking for your help, citizens, in crafting the new, revised Facebook Bill of Rights and Responsibilities.

I don't think I need to read much more. Here we have a man whose exploding business has exploded his head. In his mind, he runs a country now.

I'm about to become a Facebook ex-pat.