Tuesday, October 21, 2008

We Will be United by Grilled Chicken

I voted early. And while I like the fact that a vote is a private matter, I'll let you in on what I did.

I guess you can say I am a Communist, Socialist, Terrorist-loving America-hater now. (UPDATE: Who wants to kill babies. Thanks, Jim.)

I called my parents tonight as I was grilling. My mom already voted also. She is now a Fascist, Racist War-mongerer. Dad hasn't voted yet. He's on the fence. Both Mom and I tried to dissuade him from going over to the Dark Side, whichever side that may be.

My parents taught me to love America and to take our gifts here seriously, as my grandparents taught them. We can have fun, irreverent and jabbing debates, reiterating the talking points of our favorite partisan news networks. And we're still going to be family on November 5th. And we will all respect the President, whomever he may be. At least that's how it works in theory.

You get the point. The vitriol, hyperbole and rhetoric is temporary. In the end, win or lose, we're still in a representative democracy where everyone has a voice. We're not turning Fascist, and we're not turning Socialist. Lighten the fuck up, everybody.

And my Dad was intrigued by what I was grilling. (He taught me to love a grill.) It was an experiment, but it turned out OK.

  • Start with three boneless, skinless breast of chicken
  • Soak chicken in one bottle teriyaki marinade and one can of crushed pineapple for about an hour
  • Throw on the grill
  • Flip after a while
  • Throw some more of that marinade on them
  • If it gets dark, cut them open and see if they're done
  • Flip if not, close the grill, pour another glass of wine
  • Take off grill
Serve with horseradish rice* and salad.

* That was another experiment.

Labels: , , , , , ,

Bookmark and Share


  • 5 minutes per side, pretty side down first
    4 minutes per side after that. serve right way. Works every time. I use gas, but drop REAL hickory sawdust in, you can find it here in MO.

    Glad you voted. I'm still gonna vote old guy. All of this is preference, just what we like or don't like, for the most part.

    Except for the unborn that might never get to vote.

    Enjoy your chicken

    Jimbo at 1.11 am

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at October 22, 2008 at 2:11 AM  

  • Jim: Those times work well for gas, which you can regulate. I like the guesswork of charcoal.

    And I promise not to kill any babies, even though Obama wants me to.

    By Blogger Jetpacks, at October 22, 2008 at 11:09 AM  

  • I'm on the fence about voting early. I have my candidate (I'm a baby killer too) but I'm afraid it'll be less exciting if I vote early than if I waited 'till election day (this is my first Presidential election).
    I think I'll probably wait.

    By Anonymous Rae, at October 22, 2008 at 12:16 PM  

  • Nice work on the chicken. Might I suggest one of those probe thermometers attached to a remote sensor: You can leave the probe in and not have to lift the lid on your grill or cut into the bird to check it.
    Oh, and a handful of apple wood chips on the coals would make that chicken even better.

    Wait, what were we talking about? Oh yeah, facists and commies. Mmmm...all of a sudden I'm hungry for some teriyaki marinated fascists...

    By OpenID marriedtotheenemy, at October 22, 2008 at 3:45 PM  

  • There's a problem in your premis, except for the sensible focus on chicken.

    Your attitude might lead sensible baby killing, America hating, god denying terrorists to fight fair, because they have a moral outlook on life.

    Meanwhile the forces of life, America, god etc. will be fighting like motherfarqhaurs using every dirty tactic in the book to win at all costs.

    I'm all in favour of uniting around the grill when it's all over, but let's remember to fight tooth and nail to the bitter end first.

    By Anonymous Rohan, at October 22, 2008 at 9:52 PM  

  • Rohan: You are awesome. Wish you'd provide a link.

    By Blogger Jetpacks, at October 22, 2008 at 10:07 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home