Wednesday, July 28, 2010

We Escaped The Oil Spill, So IN YOUR FACE, Louisiana!

In the game of vacation destination advertising, you take every advantage you can get, even if that means you have to kick another destination when it's down. And covered in thick, black goop.
All over the West Coast of Florida, tourism boards are trying to convince travelers that, "There ain't no oil here!" Fort Myers / Sanibel made a nice effort with your standardly glib host riffing as he walks along the beach. This was "Day One" of their 9-day "Still Pristine" effort to woo the Gulf-visiting vacationer. They even did a "behind the scenes!" video, where the producer explains that "this has never been done before in the history of television!"

I heard a radio spot where a very, very sad sounding female voiceover said that, "Our hearts go out to the victims of the Gulf oil spill." Then she very smoothly transitioned into beach pitch-lady and offered to show you her very unaffected beaches. I'm about sick of the "Our hearts go out to," line. Much like, "Our thoughts and prayers go out to..." it's complete bullshit. It means simply, "Hey, sucks to be you!" (I hate it so much that it's a recurring, minor theme in my unpublished book. Literary agents, ping me.)

Granted, no one is out-and-out saying, "Our beaches are better than theirs," but the implication is there. So if you do vacation on the beaches of Fort Myers/ Sanibel, be a good sport and raise a glass one beautiful evening to the poor saps up the coast who didn't fare so well.

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