Where's My Jetpack?

Obama Will Get You Better Insurance

In no danger of losing their crown as the Kings of the Stupidest Banner Ads in the History of Earth, Lowermybills.com (who can forget dancing gay cowboys?) is now on the Obama bandwagon.

OK, but what does Barack Obama have to do with my auto insurance rates, and why is he wandering around the country with his arms folded and a scowl on his face?

And why does the White House float around the country, eluding Obama? Is it a political statement on the part of lowermybills? Is it a game? Are you supposed to help Obama find his house? WTF is going on here?

NOTHING is going on. It's just lowermybills doing what they do best: getting your attention in the dumbest ways possible. Lowermybills is the kid in the lunchroom who only makes people laugh because he purposely snorts milk up his nose.

But as dumb as all the lowermybills campaigns are, I'm told they are among the most effective banners ever.

So keep this formula in mind when creating banners:

Stupid/Senseless¹⁰ + Heavy Rotation = Success.

Labels: banner ads, Barack Obama, lower my bills, Lowermybills banner, stupid crap

Bring Back the Dancing Gay Cowboys

LowerMyBills.com is at it again, this time it's a man in one of those new man skirt-kilt things.

Or perhaps he's just a 1940s-styled Private Eye in a trenchcoat and a penchant for dancing like a total White Spaz, but he's no improvement over their previous dancing efforts.

I get it. Motion draws the eye to a banner ad, or else I wouldn't have seen it and blogged about it, right? But I just don't want to do business with a mortgage company that employs such methods.

I would much sooner use a mortgage company that blatantly flaunted the assests of its lenders or brokers.

Labels: banner ads, dancing banners, dancing rooftop, lower my bills, Lowermybills banner, uhll

Yet ANOTHER LowerMyBills Dancer

Gay Cowboy Dancers were horrendous. Rooftop Couple were pukeworthy. Now we have Guy in Big Suit Doing the 3-Year-Old Child On Crack Dance.

Labels: banner ads, Lowermybills banner

Lower My Brokeback Bills

I don't know a single person who likes a single one of the LowerMyBills.com banner ads. On a quest to check the weather for later this evening in my locale, I was smacked in the face with not one, but two hideous banners from these jokers. First, we have "lime green tank top wearing tattoo the front elevation of a house on his bicep" dude, but now, in the sprit of "Dancing Rooftop Couple" and "Dancing Girl with Scarf," we have "Dancing Twin Cowboys Doing a Very Gay Dance."