Toyota On The Hot Seat Because Their Trucks Are Good

Counter-terrorism officials want to know why ISIS dudes are tooling around in Toyota trucks.

Let me save you the trouble, US Officials.

Toyota trucks are good. I own one. A 2015 Tacoma. Love it.

If you are suggesting that Toyota is somehow in league with ISIS, (and it seems like you are) that's just so much bullshit.

Do they sell Toyotas in Syria? How about Iran? Iraq? Saudi Arabia? Turkey?

I'm guessing...yes?

That's where they got them.

Do you think Toyota execs are loving it every time an image of one of their vehicles is featured in the news with a band of ISIS dudes kicking up dust across the desert with a black flag and a 50 caliber machine gun in the bed? Naw...probably not. And I'm sure they frown on the way they overload the bed. You're not even supposed to ride back there!

Now, if Ford wants to jump in here, or Chevy, and make some counter-claim in their advertising, something along the lines of, "Terrorists Rarely Drive Our Trucks," that's probably fair game.

No foul here, America. Just a good truck.

Amber Waves of Median Grass

On a recent road trip halfway across this vast nation, I was struck, as I always am, by the sheer emptiness of much of the country. We have huge uninhabited forests and expansive meadows; miles of desert and endless mountain ranges.

I understand that much of it is privately owned. Much of it, however, is owned by the federal government.

 

Now of course all I'm seeing on my road trip is the Interstate and the mostly private lands that border it. Here is the Interstate system:

 

It covers 47,856 miles. Most of those miles have a grassy, very pretty median in the middle, all of it federally owned. (By the way, that "fact" about every fifth mile of the Interstate needing to be flat and straight so as to be used as an airstrip in times of war? False. I was guilty of spreading that one for years.)

All of that was a set-up for a very simple (stupid) solution to the world's refugee problem. We could fit every single refugee - from every single country - into our medians. Give them tents from Walmart or affordable storage sheds from Lowe's. Power and water exist along most of the routes. Little refugee villages all across the nation, reminding us of where we all came from and how we all got here.

What would we feed them? Oh, I dunno...how about the leftovers from the countless Cracker Barrel restaurants scattered along the Interstates? Or the 40% of the food we waste in this country. 

Of course it'll never happen. But next time I'm watching hoards of beleaguered families wandering down dusty paths toward the hope of a better life, I'm remembering those vast swaths of emptiness, those dumpsters full of food and my own good life.   

 

Step Down

Listening to Obama and Hillary talking today, I think more people should employ diplomatic language when dealing with sticky situations. (Click.)