Toyota On The Hot Seat Because Their Trucks Are Good

Counter-terrorism officials want to know why ISIS dudes are tooling around in Toyota trucks.

Let me save you the trouble, US Officials.

Toyota trucks are good. I own one. A 2015 Tacoma. Love it.

If you are suggesting that Toyota is somehow in league with ISIS, (and it seems like you are) that's just so much bullshit.

Do they sell Toyotas in Syria? How about Iran? Iraq? Saudi Arabia? Turkey?

I'm guessing...yes?

That's where they got them.

Do you think Toyota execs are loving it every time an image of one of their vehicles is featured in the news with a band of ISIS dudes kicking up dust across the desert with a black flag and a 50 caliber machine gun in the bed? Naw...probably not. And I'm sure they frown on the way they overload the bed. You're not even supposed to ride back there!

Now, if Ford wants to jump in here, or Chevy, and make some counter-claim in their advertising, something along the lines of, "Terrorists Rarely Drive Our Trucks," that's probably fair game.

No foul here, America. Just a good truck.

The Spin!

Volume something, number something, I'm too lazy to look it up right now. (Click for big.)

Crossposted to Radio Free Babylon

Passengers With Flaming Crotches Will Be Removed From the Plane

Or Fireballs, or whatever.

Some will call it profiling, but I think it's a good plan.

People I Wouldn't Mind Seeing Die Tonight on 24

It's a two-hour SuperExtravaganza episode of Fox's 24 starting NOW. Since the Fox writers have given us so many reprehensible and unsavory characters this season, I think the following people are expendable:

• The weasel FBI punk who was in on it
• The redheaded FBI chick
• Madame President Alison Taylor
• The President's bratty daughter
• The President's extremely questionable, if not corrupt Chief of Staff
• Tony Almeida - AGAIN. This time in tiny pieces.
  
• Janeane Garofalo
• Colonel Iké Dubaku

That's only four key character deaths per hour. I think Jack Bauer could justify this request.

The Horrors of War

The Florida fireant is our enemy. He serves no purpose in the yards of suburbia. His constant encroachment threatens our survival. The terror of the fireant will no longer be tolerated.

Witness this preemptive strike on a colony of fireants, as they had set up a secret underground terror cell in my backyard. They were subjected to repeated shelling by lava rock from the air.

They will be back. The fireant is a resilient foe. He fights to the death. We will not give in. And the fireant had best know this: we do not negotiate with terrorists.

The graphic nature of the following film may be unsuitable for children. Viewer discretion is advised.

Direct Mail I Failed to Throw Away

I got this in the mail during the election season, when the unrepentant Karl Rove blow-up doll Sean Hannity was hyping it as a tool against Obama. I just uncovered it under a pile of papers. Now seems like a good time to watch it.

Twitter - Tool of Terrorists

In light of recent news, the Twitter bird gets the treatment at Guantanamo.

But seriously, what communication application/tool WON'T be used by terrorists?

Would you Like to Supersize That?

Advertising That Will Live in Infamy

It's perfectly appropriate to reflect on the trying times our nation has been through, but let's not forget what a bunch of xenophobic bastards we were - and have the capacity to be again. The first image is a "US Army official poster" according to the fine print at the bottom. The second is just the National Cash Register Company reminding citizens to keep on hating. And these are nothing compared to the ones that depict the Japanese as buck-toothed monkeys.

I left a crappy part-time radio job not long after 9/11. It was about two weeks after the tragedy and I was being asked to record :10 spots for sponsors who were buying pre-scripted inanities like "Jack's Pizza condemns terrorism and stands with the victims of 9/11 and their families."


Actual Conversation:
Me: Aren't we capitalizing on the tragedy?
Sales Manager: That's what the terrorists WANT you to think!

Threat Level: Red

If I were a terrorist, (AND I'M NOT, Department of Homeland Security) I wouldn't go for water reservoirs, shopping malls or downtown skyscrapers. The way to cripple America is to unplug our cable. It's quite unsettling to lose contact with the outside world. No TV or Internet.

Tonight, no less than 8 trucks worked on a cable outage in my neighborhood. The three guys at lower right (who aren't doing anything) were slightly unnerved at my picture taking. One of them pulled out a camera phone and began shooting pictures of me, surely worried I was from the QC department.

I know - this is a great argument for the Dish Network and Verizon Wireless Internet.

Livin' for The City

This shot was likely pre-planned by a Googlite and his girlfriend. "You wanna be famous, baby? I'll be near your house on 44th Ave. at about 10 AM. When you see the car with the funky thing on top, open the passenger door and show me your thong."

Now that the Google vehicles have traversed a few cities and given us street level views of the random and daily happenings of San Francisco, Miami, New York , etc. time to go watch the world here, where viewers with lots of time are compiling the offbeat and the mundane. I've noticed that images from NYC are always blurry when it comes to people on the street, while SF's images are remarkably clear.

All the outcry over "Big Brother" is a little overblown. These aren't live views. Yet. UPDATE: But it's true, as pointed out in the comments, that the criminally-minded now have a service with which to plan their upcoming misdeeds. No more shady stalking and looking suspicious while you map the best route into that home you're going to burglarize, that airport you're going to disrupt, the best grassy knoll near the motorcade route, etc.