If It's Thursday, It Must Be...

...Band Names From Google News. (This is getting old, I think.)

Part XIII in a sporadic Thursday series

It’s become fashionable, some would say downright smart, to name your one-man/one-woman singer/songwriter act something besides your given name. Good example is Sea Wolf, known as a “band,” but in reality is just one guy. Unless you have a simple name that almost sounds made up, like say Joe Smith or maybe Jack Johnson, you need something better. And Mr. Johnson might do well to rebrand himself at this stalled point in his career. I would suggest “Barefoot Stoner Repetition.” You may also use your own name if it's some sort of bizarre joke. Like if you're a black man and you have a goofy white name, you will be successful, no matter your level of talent. Just ask Lenny Kravitz.

So anyway, all you lone-wolf dudes and chicas singing your hearts out in crappy clubs on open mic nights, here are some names you might try on, gleaned from today’s headlines at Google News.

• Inevitable Cloak
• Molotov Mullet Man
• Cool at Cannes
• A Bit Wary
• The French Teachers
• Question Direction
• Sorry I Called You Sweetie

I’ve been known to pose as Radio Free Babylon.

Here are 83 more.