Swiss Army Airstream

They collaborated with Design Within Reach to build a very cool, limited edition trailer, now the streamlined futurists of Airstream have teamed up with Victorinox, the Swiss company best known for the Swiss Army Knife. In honor of Victorinox's 125th anniversary, Airstream built a trailer that is very likely hands down their coolest ever.

The unfortunate part of this promotion is that they only built 125 of them. Here's a dealer in Jersey offering one. MSRP is 60K, so that might explain why they only built 125.

From what I can tell, the Airstream devotee is not unlike a Mac cultist. Once you go Mac, you never go back. And once you go Airstream, you'll feel like a gypsy derelict in anything but. I took the Mac plunge and I am considering getting a voodoo doll of Bill Gates for my desk. I am willing to sell my creativity (for a while anyway) to Airstream.

I would like to take this opportunity to offer Airstream a great deal: in exchange for this trailer, I will create a blog devoted to how awesome you are, with pictures and everything. I will also tweet about your greatness incessantly, or until such time as I feel I have paid off the 60K. I have plans to make my new Airstream blog really fun, so if you could also give me a couple extra hundred thousand in cash so I can quit my job and travel the country, the blog will be much cooler. Who wants to read about how the trailer sits in my driveway? When you deliver my new Airstream Swiss Army Limited Edition Caravan of Badness, please include a 17" Macbook Pro. Thank you in advance for your prompt attention to this matter.

And like every good business worth their shiny stainless steel skin, Airstream is on Twitter. Three. Times.

Time is Running Out on Watchmakers

Chances are you are not an astronaut or a fighter pilot. You're probably not a Navy SEAL. And I'm not really going out on any limbs to doubt that few of you are secret agents, competitive yachtsmen or race car drivers.

The New York Times included this morning a "special advertising supplement" (66 pages) devoted exclusively to "luxury timepieces." Or "chronographs." These are those things that used to be called "watches." You wear them on your wrist and glance down at them, just in case you didn't see the clock on your computer, your phone, the one in your car, the three in the kitchen, the one on the cable box and the one on the DVD player.


I was in a meeting not long ago in which sat about 12 people ranging in age from 25 to 45. Men and women, professionals all, and not a one of us was wearing a watch. We made mention of this and it was agreed that there was no point anymore in wearing a watch. Watchmakers know this is happening and they're seeing their sales fall. Included in the NYT's glossy watch magazine was a two-page spread asking a bunch of smug, white CEOs of watch companies, "Why do you wear a watch?" They gave answers like, "A watch reflects my attitude," and "A watch is a private piece of art," and "It is all about unlimited pleasure and fantastic emotion." OK. As long as we agree that it's just an accessory at this point and is not really used for keeping time. And I need to spend thousands of dollars for this thing that has devolved into a status symbol?

Good luck, watchmakers. I'm sure the NYT was glad to take your money for what will prove to be a failed effort. I understand that in hard economic times it is important to advertise, but you are selling something no one really needs or can really afford right now.

Previously in watch rants: Never Seem to Find the Time

This is My Rifle

In today's climate, selling a career in the military to young men and women has to be a tough job. But the USMC has put together a very elaborate (and effective?) campaign featuring the "Silent Drill Platoon."

This is the same commercial production that caused a stir in San Francisco last November when city officials refused the Marines access to the Golden Gate Bridge. It started airing late last month. I couldn't find any agency related to it, but MTLB thinks JWT had a hand in this.

Unlike the usual military recruitment ads, this one has no scenes of combat training, no one in battle dress uniform yelling orders to warriors with painted faces, no screeching planes or helicopters. Starting in Rhode Island, we see scenes of America in a veritable sea to shining sea depiction of amber waves of grain, alabaster cities gleaming and purple mountain majesty, with this silent drill team showcasing their precision skills, culminating in a nice shot of the very bridge they were denied access to.

Here's the "official extended version."



They've also put together a bunch of "on location" videos of the various shoots.

Times Square, Kentucky, Grand Canyon, Rocky Mountains, San Francisco, Rhode Island

And of course, there's a companion website.

Will this increase recruitment? I don't know. But it sure is pretty. And I think even the most dyed-in-the-wool San Francisco pacifist can appreciate good film-making, even if you deem that film propaganda. You might even feel a slight hint of patriotism stirring in your cynical heart.

Previously in Military Recruitment:

(Holland) Wars and Rumors of Wars
(Georgia) Georgia on My Mind
(England) Breadfruit, Rum and Scurvy
(Czech Republic and United States) Czechs Kick Our Cinematic Butts
(Russia) Someone Still Loves You, Boris Yeltsin
(Australia) Throw Another Shrimp on the Barbed Wire
(Japan) Adventure's Waitin' Just Ahead

Wars and Rumors of Wars

Most military recruitment ads follow some variation of the formula Slow Motion + Rain + Dramatic Music + Closeup Hero Shots + Gritted teeth = Boys Will Sign Up. The Dutch Royal Marines add another element: selectivity. The US Marines strongly hint at it in their ads, but it's well depicted here in this ad from the Netherlands.



Previously in Military Recruitment:

(Georgia) Georgia on My Mind
(England) Breadfruit, Rum and Scurvy
(Czech Republic and United States) Czechs Kick Our Cinematic Butts
(Russia) Someone Still Loves You, Boris Yeltsin
(Australia) Throw Another Shrimp on the Barbed Wire
(Japan) Adventure's Waitin' Just Ahead

Georgia On My Mind

Not that Georgia, the Republic of Georgia, north of Turkey, mainly because in his remarks to Congress earlier this week, General Petraeus mentioned how this "coaltion partner" was helping secure areas of Iraq. So let's look at their recruiting efforts.



Hmmm, lots of soldiering going on here, with recurring marching and firing of weapons themes. There's very little of the lighter side of military service seen in the recruitment spots of other countries. You know, meeting friends, seeing the world, playing rugby, hanging out on the beach, indulging in casual sex with strangers in exotic ports of call. An ominous music score sells danger and threats from Russia. These Georgians are serious.

Previously in Military Recruitment:

(England) Breadfruit, Rum and Scurvy
(Czech Republic and United States) Czechs Kick Our Cinematic Butts
(Russia) Someone Still Loves You, Boris Yeltsin
(Australia) Throw Another Shrimp on the Barbed Wire
(Japan) Adventure's Waitin' Just Ahead

Never Seem to Find the Time

Pictured here is the Yacht Master II from Rolex, because the Yacht Master wasn't elegant and luxurious enough.

In the year 2000 (June, as I recall) my watch stopped working. At first it bugged me, not being able to look down at my wrist and know the time. Eventually I realized that no matter where I went, there was a clock of some kind within sight. There are two in my kitchen in the form of the microwave and a CD player. The cable boxes show the time. My computers have clocks. My cell phone displays the time. There's a clock in the car. We've got clocks on the walls.

Conclusion: I don't need a frickin' watch, or "precision chronograph" or whatever they call them tomorrow. And if, as Seiko tries to tell me, "It's your watch that says the most about who you are," then I must be subhuman.

All you guys who own Rolexes and Breitlings and Tag Heuers and whatnot can now post comments about how when you're yachting, or piloting your plane, or fly fishing in Alaska, or rocketing to the international space station, it's much easier to look at your wrist than your cell phone. Also, feel free to tell me how the clocks in my home rely on electricty and what if that went out? I don't care. I'm not buying a watch. Or fixing my old one.