Hey, NFL - I Was Thinking...

I was watching football over the Holiday weekend and was amazed at the number of empty seats in the stands. LP Field in Nashville, home of the Tennessee Titans, a decent team with a 6-5 record, was maybe half empty. An optimist might call that stadium half-full, but when you're talking about an NFL venue, you would rather be Lambeau Field, a stadium that would sell out even if the Packers were winless well into the season. Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego also had large sections of empty seats, a strange thing when the Denver Tebows were in town, the hottest topic in all of sports right now.

Television coverage for a football fan can be very frustrating, particularly if you rely on the networks and don't have some pricey premium package. (Let's not even talk about the ridiculous dispute between the NFL Network and the cable giants, who can't come to terms, thus depriving us from even considering a pricey premium package.) So if you live on the East Coast, it will be a rare day when you get to see the Seahawks, the Raiders or the 49ers play. Down here in Florida, we are subjected to Buccaneers, Dolphins or Jaguars games; three teams that make up the Triangle of Suck in the NFL. If we aren't being made to watch them stink up the field, then the networks assume we want to see the Patriots. Recent weekends, I have seen more of Tom Brady and that homeless guy who coaches the Patriots than I have my own dog.

When football is not on, the Sports Centers of TV and the web or the Sports Sections of print and online journalism are talking about football. It is, no one can argue, the new national pastime. We don't give a crap about baseball, in comparison. We eat it up, can't get enough of it, and will watch the sorriest matchup in history if it is the only game on TV. 

Which brings me to my point. A football fan will watch any game if it is the only game available. So...WHAT IF...the NFL played six days a week? (My original plan called for seven days a week, but I'm reminded that Saturday is college football day, and that would not sit well with the American football watching public to mix it up like that.)

The season would still be 17 weeks long, you'd just have fewer games per day. There are 32 teams, which makes 15 games a week, allowing for two teams having a bye every week. So, two games on Monday, two on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. On Sunday you'd have two early games, two late games and one night game. If a team plays on a Monday, to avoid fatigue and allow for jet-lag recovery, that team plays the following week on a Tuesday.  It would be a scheduling nightmare, to be sure, but not one that some innovative programmer couldn't overcome. A fan could conceivably watch every game all season long, granted with a little back and forth on the remote control between the games happening simultaneously.

What about the other TV shows that would get bumped if CBS, FOX or NBC were to take this on? Oh, how sad it would be if 2 Broke Girls or Whitney or one more CSI wasn't available. Move it to another night or time. If the networks follow the money, which they will, they know that the NFL is a ratings bonanza. Let ESPN and ESPN 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and The Ocho get in on the bidding. Advertising, dollars, ratings, licensing, perhaps even stadium attendance will be affected. (We all know that a nationally televised game fills seats better than one only available in the local market.)

I'm sure there are too many interests involved in a plan like this for it ever to really happen, the most powerful likely being the NFL and their precious NFL Network, but I'm throwing it out there. Football fans and football haters are invited to weigh in in the comments section. Tell me why I'm wrong, why this won't work, or what we could do to make it happen. If you're a fan of Whitney, just be quiet. That show is getting canceled and you know it.    

Line Up The Endorsements for Eli

My Dad was riding his bike in the woods yesterday and saw a panther. Seriously. Up around Ormond Beach. The giant cat was lounging in the middle of the trail 50 yards ahead of him. Dad wisely made a U-turn. There are only supposed to be 80 to 100 panthers left in Florida, so that was sort of cool. Speaking of panthers, they’re from North Carolina. I mean the football Panthers of the NFL. Speaking of the NFL, there was a game last night. It was not all it was advertised to be. It was supposed to be the crowning of a dynasty. We were supposed to be worshipping today at the altar of the Best Team To Ever Walk Onto A Field In The History Of The Universe – Starring Tom Brady As The Messiah King Of Kings, With A Special Appearance By The Creator Of All That Is And Will Ever Be, Bill Belichick.

Nobody likes a dynasty and everybody likes a Cinderella story. Well over 75% of football fans were rooting for exactly what happened*. And if anyone saw the post game interview with New England coach Bill Belichick, you saw a man who fully bought all the hype and praise the media had heaped on him and his team. And he didn’t know how to handle a loss. He couldn’t even say, “The Giants played a great game.”

As for the commercials…what can be said that isn't being said elsewhere and beyond? I suspect aliens on other planets are talking about those commercials by now. Some were great (talking baby for eTrade), some striving way too hard (heart jumping from woman’s chest for CareerBuilder) and some just flat-out stoopid with a capital WTF (Chinese stereotyped pandas for Sales Genie).

I've never been much of a Giants fan. Until last night. I’m thinking maybe this game was a foreshadowing of the fall of another prematurely crowned dynasty.

*Unsubstantiated percentage based on this author's personal dislike of the Patriots.

New York Giants

The Similarities are Striking

Both are recognized dynasties

Both are often referred to as “machines”

Both have been accused of cheating

Both crush opponents without mercy

Both are hated by more people than support them

Both are considered inevitable winners

Both are robotic and mechanical

The defeat of either would prompt spontaneous nationwide partying

This Guy Gets Easier to Hate Every Day

Maybe I just hate dynasties. Maybe I like my heroes a little more tarnished. If Brady got busted operating a dog fighting ring, I'd probably respect him more. As it is, every time the camera is on him, he's got the self-conscious look of someone who knows the camera is on him.

OJ Simpson is Turning Over in His Grave

On a night when the hated Cowboys had absolutely no reason to win, they somehow pulled it out in the final second of a very good game. Sucks to live in Buffalo today, but they're all consoling each other with, "We showed spirit and unity and put up a helluva fight when no one thought we could hang with the Cowboys." My favorite team is whoever is playing the Cowboys.

Face it, Dallas friends, the rest of the country looks at this man and sees the devil. And just like the devil, the Cowboys always manage to win. My 2nd most hated team is New England. I look forward to watching them beat Dallas next week.

When I was a kid, I was brainwashed and thought the Cowboys were great. I even had a Cowboys coat. I've since been deprogrammed.