Coffee With Jesus Volume I, No. 5

Mas grande via clickito

Coffee With Jesus - No. 4

Click.

Bleeding an Idea Dry: Coffee with Jesus #3

Coffee With Jesus

Click it. Click it good.

Bad Puns To Wake You Up

I was in that sleep twilight state his morning when this came to me. Even in my sleep I can't avoid silly 4th grade humor.

Buy a dozen at the store.

Politics Makes Strange Bedfellows and Breakfast Mates

Here's the perfect gift for the right-leaning Tea-Partier or the left-leaning Liberation Theologian on your Christmas list. It's Jesus as a politician! Because Jesus caucuses with your party!

Chances are good they won't get it or they'll find it sacrilegious. But chances are good that their politics are too.

Available now at my store.

Quit Bothering Jesus

Jennifer's been stalking Jesus with her Flip Video camera. He's getting tired of it.

I suppose I could write a lengthy essay on what this might mean, but I'll save that for another time and place.

Original image from the inspirational collection of the talented Roger Loveless.

Back to School! With Jesus!

Happy Easter (or Your Favorite Pagan Fertility Festival)

Irreverence is in the Eye of the Beholder

Iconic images are used in ads all the time. Think Che, Obama, or as Copyranter points out today, the Mona Lisa. This might work as a Good Friday ad in predominantly Catholic, Spanish speaking countries.


Previously in "Jesus Likes Beer":
Jesus is Bringing You a Case of Heinies.
The Church of Heineken

Jesus Supports Your Agenda

For my 1,000th post here at Where's My Jetpack? - a simple Photoshop hack-job in honor of Patriot Day. He makes a fine Republican, doncha think? But he's still two years too young to be elected President.


(This is actually Dick Cheney's official portrait, with the classic Jesus painting head stuck on.)

Holy Cow

A local news station, desperate for news, ran two stories yesterday I could've done without. One was about a cat owner who sees an image of Jesus in her cat's fur. The other was about a plumber who sees an image of the Virgin Mary in a stain in a sink.

I couldn't see what they were seeing, and rarely can when these dumb things show up. Elvis in your grilled cheese. The Pope in a fire. Mary in the window of an office building. And it's always Jesus, Mary and Elvis. How did Elvis make that grade? Oh, well. Maybe some people get a faith lift out of imagining this stuff.

But until your dairy cow sports an image of Jesus like the one below, I won't be seeing what you're seeing.

Cirque du Jésus

I suppose it's not the smartest idea to take pictures while driving in heavy traffic, but I've started bringing my camera to work simply because I often see things I wish I could take pictures of throughout the day.

Here we have a crucified Christ, although he's not on a cross. He's swinging wildly on a string of beads hanging from this guy's rear view mirror, like some gymnast doing the iron cross on the rings.

Sometimes I'm a Fourth Grader

I was searching for an image of a door yesterday when I happened upon one of those classic "Jesus Knocking on the Door" pictures. I couldn't help myself.

We Don't Discuss Such Things in Polite Company

It's not all business humor in the brand new "Where's My Jetpack?" comic strip. I can do topical and religous, too - and in this case, both. I've been advised by two respected people not to put this one out there, but it still makes me laugh. But then, my Middle School Humor Index is pretty high.

Part Three in my just-developed-this-morning comic strip called "Where's My Jetpack?"







I have yet to be approached by a comic strip syndicate.

Louisiana Trailer Trash

And other comments on our disgusting declining pop culture.

• In case there are still a few of my countrymen and women wondering why our nation's standing in the eyes of the rest of the world has dropped so significantly in recent years, I can show you. It wasn't just George Bush and the Iraq fiasco. This chick is just as guilty, if not more so.
• As for Kanye and 50, have you ever seen a more manufactured "fight" or a more transparent attempt to revive the dying recording industry? If Mr. Jackson shoots Mr. West, then I'll believe this is real.
• Kid Rock bitch-slapped Tommy Lee. Good. Now maybe we can put the both of them in a battle to the death live on Pay-per-View.
• And finally, it's official: this country is going to Hell. Kathy Griffin received an Emmy. That in itself would be reason enough for the Almighty to punish us.

None of the news outlets want to report EXACTLY what this sack of unfunny had to say upon receiving her award. Here's how mainstream media reports it:

In her speech, Griffin said that "a lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus."

She went on to hold up her Emmy, make an off-color remark about Christ and proclaim, "This award is my god now!"

The off-color remark no-one wants to mention was "Suck it, Jesus."

Next time, Kathy, say something about Mohammed and I will laugh when they issue a fatwa on your head.

Easy target, that Jesus.