And I Thought I Sucked at Photoshop

A commenter on my recent post, wherein I attempted to make light of digital art and the Tea Party movement all at once, failed to see the humor. OK, Tim. Whatever. Relax a little, bro. I guess what I thought was funny and obviously tongue-in-cheek did not register with some. Maybe I should endeavor to be more mainstream henceforth and curb my appetite for the bizarre and off-the-wall, the better not to confuse and bewilder my more literal-minded readers.

But if Tim wants to cast stones at people who suck at Photoshop, he can look no further than this ad, a full-pager from yesterday's New York Times Magazine, in which a golfer is lining up a putt while a massive, not-at-all-Photoshopped alligator lines up on him. 
(Click image for larger.)

His Status as Role Model is Even More Secure Now

Donuts and Golf

Our production managers here in CubeWorld™ are always being visited by print reps. I suspect they are print reps because they are always carrying donuts when they enter the department. Then I am positive they are print reps when I hear the conversations they have with our production managers. They are masters of the superficial. They know when a new picture has appeared in a PM’s cubicle and will comment on it. They know that one PM’s wife just delivered a baby and they will talk about staying up all night with a crying infant. They know that another of our guys likes classic rock and the reps will chat him up about The Eagles or The Stones.

Small-talk is expected and a vendor rep has no choice but to engage in it. Those who do it better than others are likely more successful. But why are donuts the universal calling card of vendors? In this obesity-obsessed, saturated fat conscious culture, you'd think the donut's day was done. I've hated donuts since childhood. If I were a vendor’s rep, I’d show up with sushi. Or tickets to the classic rock concert for the guy who's into that.

And why is golf the universal business pastime? Why are deals supposedly made on the golf course? I have never golfed, don't want to golf, can't afford golf and pretty much hate most of the golfers I've ever known. If I were a vendor’s rep, I’d take my clients to the disc golf course.