If The Griswolds Had Money

The fictitious, multicultural Hilfiger family gather in a field to feast. I've never owned a piece of Hilfiger clothing, the brand a bit too preppie for my tastes. But this spot, in the words of the creative director, takes the preppie image and "subverts" it, "twists" it. Add a little Vampire Weekend "Holiday" and you have, hopefully, people buying clothes this Friday. 



There is an alternate version where the dog drives the Jeep away. The ending feels wrong to me, with the actor/model's sarcastic delivery nearly taking away from the feel-good vibe of the piece. It seems tacked on to what was a nice finish. That's nitpicking though. The attention to detail and continuity with the ubiquitous print campaign are flawless.

If you watch it on the Hilfiger site, there's an opportunity to see a "behind the scenes" video at the conclusion off the :60.

And because I'm weird like this and HAVE to know why this was included in the print ad, I've contacted GS Tuning, BMW Specialists of Santa Rosa, CA to find out what their relationship is with the campaign, as they have a minor role in this two-page spread in yesterday's New York Times Style magazine on the back of a beautifully restored BMW 2002, the ultimate, I'm told, prepmobile.

Ads That Work In Spite of Themselves

Every Sunday morning I flip through the Times magazine in search of blog fodder; an ad that I can praise or mock. Fashion ads are easy targets. (See here.) But this morning, a busily designed ad kept me staring for a long time. (Click image for very large.) On the surface this is throwaway crap, if your idea of a good ad means pretty photography and limited copy. But the more you study it, the more intriguing it becomes.

It starts, strangely, with the words "Om Sai Ram" in the upper left corner. I had to look that one up. It's a spiritual greeting used by followers of Sai Baba, a South Indian guru. Then we have the very generic headline "The Million Dollar Look," and the equally bland subhead, "Dress for Success." Then some copy telling men that if they want to be successful, they should have these custom clothes by Hong Kong Grand by William Sani. And your mind goes, "Oh, a Hong Kong tailor, like in my grandfather's day, when people who could afford to went to Hong Kong to get custom-fitted for a suit." Hong Kong tailored suits were some sort of badge of success, and people who wore them would not be shy in telling you where they came from. I'm sure guys still do this. William Sani is from Orange County, California though, and that's him on the far left dressed as a 1960s British banker, and again second from right, as James Bond. His son is the little man second from left. No clue on who the guy far right is, but he's got a phone to his ear, and that spells success. Here's William's Facebook and here's his website, where you can also see his wife, daughter and the family dog. I assume that the cityscape behind the men is Hong Kong. Then William gives you his "direct cellphone" number, inviting you to call him for an appointment. (In a later mention of his cellphone, he gives hours that you can call, but fails to mention a time zone.) Or you can get in touch at one of his two AOL email accounts.

Then we get to the catalog-styled portion of the ad, which forces the suit-buying man to study it to see which package he would prefer, compare prices and offers. Is he a President, a CFO, a CEO? Just how successful does he want to be?

Then, the nationwide barnstorming tour dates of Mr. Sani are offered, where in less than a month he will visit 21 hotels, racking up some serious Marriott Rewards points and presumably meeting and measuring the suit-buying public for their successful clothes made in Hong Kong. He asks that you call him the day you want an appointment. Scheduling is apparently not Mr. Sani's thing. Day to day, city to city, Marriott to Marriott. Then I guess he sends those measurements to Hong Kong, where his team of seamstresses whip up your order and ship it to you. Then, at the party, you constantly but casually, as if by accident or searching for your pen, reveal the inside of the left breast pocket to display that telling Hong Kong Grand label.
 
It's not hard to find former customers of Hong Kong Grand who were deeply disappointed in what they received for their money, but Mr. Sani has apparently been doing full-pagers like this for quite some time. So he knows what he's doing, at least as an advertiser. I suppose his suite at the Marriott will be a revolving door of men hoping to look successful, Mr. Sani in shirtsleeves and tape measure, ordering up lunch from room service.

To finish off the piece, we get something you never see. The ad's designer signs his work at the very bottom, even offering his phone number.

If nothing else, an intriguing ad. And it's probably working.

Fashion Ads Made Easy

(Click image for hugeness.) Are you considering attending a community college to get your Associate's degree in fashion marketing? Perhaps you are taking bids from ad agencies to create your next two-page spread for your summer collection. Well, either one of those endeavors would be a huge waste of money and time. All you need is internet access, Photoshop, maybe a digital camera and a cheaply paid model or two.

You start with a location, preferably somewhere desolate, abandoned and fairly ugly. In this instance we've chosen an old, defunct gas station location stolen from someone's Picasa account. Other popular locations include barns, alleys, deserts and beaches. If you go with a beach location, make sure the day is gloomy and overcast. Next, do an image search for "sullen" or something equally unhappy and you will come up with someone like our model in the foreground. ("Somber" also works.) She is not modeling your clothing, and that is perfectly fine. She is there to make the viewer say "What the hell?" A hint of skin is essential. If not, he or she should be completely covered, perhaps in a burka, adding to the "Huh?" factor.

Now you are ready to feature your product. In this instance, we will assume it's the man's coat. Or his shoes. Doesn't matter in the least. Unless you are creating in-store posters for Target or Wal-Mart, it is absolutely essential that your models be forbidden to smile. While most fashion models should be fairly practiced at the unsmiling pose, we want total authenticity. It is often helpful if you berate him or her, telling them things that will hurt a model's feelings, such as, "Damnit! I wanted a slim model!" or "Holy crap! I asked for "sexy guy" and they send me YOU?" Your product need not be featured upfront, in fact, it is best if it is not. Oftentimes, you may choose to not even show your product, which is fine. We are setting a mood, creating an illusion, and sometimes your product simply ruins the ad.

You may wonder if you need a headline now. No, you do not. What are you going to say? Something clever, mysterious or hip? Don't try it. All you need now is your fashion line's name, very large. And it is key that the first and last letters of the name extend out of the ad's frame. Then bring down the opacity of the name.

Congratulations, you are now a fashion ad designer.

Put Your Ass in The Air Like You Just Don't Care

Reminiscent of the Casare Paciotti ad from a few years back, we have a passed out woman, martini glass on the floor, face down on a white leather couch in a short dress. She is but the next local model in a series of ads for Scan Design, a trendy Florida furniture store known for provocative, odd ads.

She is in love with her couch. Why is that so wrong? So she's a potential victim of date-rape by her lusty couch. Why is THAT so wrong? She is in love, and the couch knows it can have its way with her, because it respects her in the morning.

Scan Design excuse themselves in the copy of this ad, explaining that the idea came from a painter who was simply trying to win their competition, the theme of which was "Fall in Furniture Love." The painting is the template for this ad. It's an ad within an ad. So clever.  Rustin Robinson painted a woman passed out face down on her knees, bent over a couch with her ass in the air. And he won. (Click image for the big.)

Obama for D&C

You've seen their ads, the highly charged and curious group photographs that suggest a gang rape or gay orgy. On his recent trip overseas, President Obama was photographed outside the home of the Ambassador to France. I like that we have a leader who isn't afraid to sit on some steps, ("disgracing the office," many will say) but I could not resist childishly converting the scene.

Colored Spectacles

It's nearly summertime, so it's time for the fashion boutiques to sell you "eyewear," better known as sunglasses. Saw this ad today and it made me cringe, so I had to caption it.

And if you go to the Bottega Veneta website and can actually find the sunglasses, (pages 78-79) you'll find the exclusive phrasing, "Price available upon request," which is not-so-secret code for, "You asked, which means you can't afford them."

I have been a picky sunglasses shopper in years past, but I finally found a maker in American Optical that are affordable and rugged. Problem is they aren't stocked at the mall or found in boutiques. You can find them at Army Navy stores or on military bases for about $40. Or online at American Optical's very bad website for much more. Come to think of it, J. Peterman sells them with a name change to "Fort Knox Sunglasses."

Anyway, I'm looking at that ad above and wondering how much it cost. I'm sure Lord and Lady Douche there don't work for less than a thousand a day, minimum. Then you've got your lighting director, your director of photography, your photographer's assistant, your creative director, studio fee or location fee, agency hangers-on just hanging on and makeup and hair people. I'll bet it took two days to get that stupid shot and cost about as much as the average American makes in a year.

So I took my AO's outside (I'm going to start calling them "AO's" to up the cool factor) and set them by the pool and created a couple of better ads in about five minutes.

big version

big version

Girl, Eat Something

I'm pretty sure your boyfriend won't mind if you put on a couple pounds. Go on, have a light dressing on that salad, or some skim milk on your 1/2 cup of Special K.

Cigarettes and vodka make for an unhealthy diet.

That Elusive Bible College Demo

Matching sweaters? Check.
Matching white pants? Check.
Matching white socks? Check.
Matching white Keds^®? Check.

We're all set, Nancy! Let's go out to the woods on our bicycles and study the Bible on a split rail fence.

A quick check of the Keds website reveals they still have that iconic blue rubber logo. And judging by their new campaign, Be True, they know just who they want in a customer - who they've always had - very clean white chicks between the ages of 20 and 40 who want to be adventurous, but don't really want to be adventurous.

Image via.

Young John Kerry Models Revived Members Only™ Jacket

It shouldn't have happened, but another 80s style is coming back, as seen in this ad for Ralph Lauren's new "Tech Jacket." Ralph did away with the epaulettes and gave it a tapered look, but there's something eerily familiar in that nylon sheen.

Watch an old Members Only commercial, just to start your week off with a cringe. You're welcome.

Release Your Inner Stripper

Not living in New York or LA, I don't know this store (shop, boutique, designer) so I can't even be sure what is being sold. The shoes, the bag, the black...thing...the models are wearing?

It doesn't matter. They are really selling a brand, a mood, a mystique, an attitude. And I'm sure it works on the demo targeted. I'm seeing Paris Hilton and the Olsen Twins.

Scamp did some nice work for Levi's where it's all about attitude and mystique. You know what Levi's are, what they mean. So the product doesn't even need to be in the ads.

Harley-Davidson could take a clue.

Previously in "Stranger Than Fashion"

Pink Shirted Soccer Team
Chicks Dig Stuffed Animals
Crocs: Just Say No
Androgyny Won't Go Away
ChuckTaylor Rolls in His Grave
On a Fashion Shoot

Scanned from The New York Times Magazine

The Clothes are Secondary

Fun with Fashion.

The latest installment in the clip art comic strip called "Where's My Jetpack?"