Jane's Roller Coaster Day - For All To See

Some people need to get a grip. Or take a pill. Or at least stop sharing so much.

(Click for better legibility.)

It's a Good Gig If You Can Get It - Part II

It's a Good Gig If You Can Get It

Previously in "Everyone knows everything."

Sometimes The Light's Just Right

And your groggy Monday morning head says, "Maybe it's because I haven't had any coffee yet, but the way the light is streaming through the window on this lemon and tomato is sublime. I should add this blue mug of coffee and then take a picture and then sell the picture to someone with a trendy kitchen/dining area."

Yeah - it's probably lack of coffee.

Day After Thanksgiving Self-Indulgent Creative Exercise

Had a song stuck in my head, so I cut it up into a :30 promo for Radio Free Babylon, filling it with old images from this blog.

BMW - The Car Preferred by Spoiled Brats

Disappointed that this commercial made it to air, as it is not in keeping with the quality of work BMW usually puts out. There are plenty of ways to illustrate "accept no substitute," without resorting to this.

Ungrateful child shops with mom for a toy train. He will only accept the top-of-the-line expensive train. Flash forward to his teen years and the 80s bedecked ass has his eye on the Les Paul when his dad wants to buy the less expensive guitar. Now he is an adult and growing up rich and demanding has taught him that he will accept only that which he has set his greedy, little childish heart on.

Dumb idea.

Dr. Pepper - Snapple Group Suing Facebook

"As early as 1936, the phrase, 'You like it,' has been associated with our product," said Charles Grigg, representing the soft drink giant. "Facebook has appropriated this phrase and used it without authorization from Dr. Pepper - Snapple." The full text of Mr. Grigg's remarks are here.

Unable to cope after the election of a Catholic man to the office of President, Mr. and Mrs. Dan Jones of Middletown suffered numerous nervous breakdowns before undergoing simultaneous lobotomies. They now enjoy trains and 7-up. Their children, Bobby and Sally, are again leading normal lives, only slightly scarred by the events of the previous months.

The Onion - Not Trying to Be Viral - Just Doing It

Consistently better comedy than you'll find on TV - and now it's coming to TV January 21st on IFC, the Independent Film Channel. Hope that doesn't kill the mojo.

It's like Mad Magazine for adults, The Onion almost always does great humor, the kind you pass around to friends, making it....oh what's that word everyone wants to be...ah yes, VIRAL! But too many marketers don't understand that you can't just "make" a viral item, be it a video, cartoon, image or whatever. It has to have a reason to be viral, like humor or thought or intrigue. And all too often someone's idea of what should be viral is not the public's idea. If you try too hard you won't succeed. Remember that old phrase they tried to kick to the curb, "Content is King?" It's true.

There are agencies out there that will claim they can create viral buzz for your brand. Most of the time, they can get all their employees to tweet and blog about something they did for your brand, and they might bump you up the Digg rankings, but in the end a media push gets sniffed out and people don't fall for it. Here's a guy writing a column about how to create a viral buzz. The first commenter comes along and nails it: viral just happens, you don't create it. Yeah, that's what I said.

See below for a good example of what could be viral, at least for a two-day stretch in late November in the US.

Black as Pitch Was That First Friday in the New World

Black Friday Time Trials

A mishap on the track disqualifies a shopper, but we watch this sport just to see the wrecks, don't we?

Give Thanks

What Some Company's On-Hold Messaging Should Sound Like

And when I say "some company's" I mean the company mentioned in this little MP3. The game show host voice style is modeled directly from the actual company's on-hold voiceover guy, as is the horrendous accent he employs when he asks you to "marque el dos." The rest is just me being an angry customer who likely won't use this company again.

If The Griswolds Had Money

The fictitious, multicultural Hilfiger family gather in a field to feast. I've never owned a piece of Hilfiger clothing, the brand a bit too preppie for my tastes. But this spot, in the words of the creative director, takes the preppie image and "subverts" it, "twists" it. Add a little Vampire Weekend "Holiday" and you have, hopefully, people buying clothes this Friday. 



There is an alternate version where the dog drives the Jeep away. The ending feels wrong to me, with the actor/model's sarcastic delivery nearly taking away from the feel-good vibe of the piece. It seems tacked on to what was a nice finish. That's nitpicking though. The attention to detail and continuity with the ubiquitous print campaign are flawless.

If you watch it on the Hilfiger site, there's an opportunity to see a "behind the scenes" video at the conclusion off the :60.

And because I'm weird like this and HAVE to know why this was included in the print ad, I've contacted GS Tuning, BMW Specialists of Santa Rosa, CA to find out what their relationship is with the campaign, as they have a minor role in this two-page spread in yesterday's New York Times Style magazine on the back of a beautifully restored BMW 2002, the ultimate, I'm told, prepmobile.

Bad Puns To Wake You Up

I was in that sleep twilight state his morning when this came to me. Even in my sleep I can't avoid silly 4th grade humor.

Buy a dozen at the store.

I Friended Your Mom

Where are the kids congregating now? I know they've discovered a cool new hideout where their parents and the marketers aren't lurking. Yet. Or at least I would've by now if Facebook had been around when I was a kid. Blocking isn't enough. Facebook has to be reaching "gay" status pretty soon if it hasn't already.

Rest assured, kids, the marketers will find you - and hot on their heels are your parents. Keep running!

No Worries: Rush Will Never End Up Like Johnny Rotten

Here's a new spot from AT&T that features a slacker dad shopping for his newborn daughter. He rides around on a mouse wearing a Rush t-shirt. Get it? He's shopping online!!! And likely found the Rush onesie here. The girl will likely grow up to be a total geek.



I can't lie anymore, I love Rush, but I don't know how I feel about them getting this much mainstream action. I mean sure, I pitched them collaborating with Porsche, but that was based on their music.

As Geddy Lee said, "We're the world's biggest cult band." Maybe all the love the band has received in the last year has made them an "acceptable" cult band. I guess I'm glad they're finally getting their due.

Locally, a music writer I follow on Twitter went to their recent show in Tampa. Money quote:

"...a talented band that has forged a strong and unique bond with its fans simply by being honest about who they are and what they do. If that’s not punk rock, I don’t know what is."

Eat it, John Lydon.

(I posted this spot earlier in its unfinished state, but the agency requested it be removed from YouTube because it wasn't done.)

How To Facebook - Free From Your Competitor

I posted earlier this month about a Tennessee agency that understands social media (in addition to doing some nice old-school TV). They found that post and seemed to "Like" it. I corresponded a little with someone from the agency, expressing my concern that maybe they were giving away the keys to the kingdom with this Facebook tab, which pretty much explains what most agencies only pretend to explain.

They aren't concerned about that. They don't care if you steal it. In fact, it's aimed at marketers and developers, with definitions, explanations and even resources for code.

I like that confidence. That's like Peyton Manning holding a quarterbacks clinic for current NFL starters. "Sure, I'll teach you everything I know, but in the end, you're still Jon Kitna and I'm Peyton Manning."

Forward Thinking

Click for the bigness.

The Head of Zuckerberg and the Voice of Napolitano

Found this old illustration on Flickr and repurposed it for today's events. (It gets much bigger.)

He Loves Them, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

I suppose many pages will be written on how Steve Jobs stopped the world today to announce that music by The Beatles is now available on iTunes. This was billed as an earth-shattering announcement that would change everything. Forever. I'm not going to waste too many words on it. This picture will speak for me.

Tech News! (A Crude Experiment in Text to Movie)

With a voice dub and some other things.

Tech News from Radio Free Babylon on Vimeo.

Supersaturated Street Scenes - Nation's Capital

I know you do this, too. You find an agency's address on their website and then go see what their building looks like, wondering how you might like working there. I did that recently for an agency in the DC area looking for a senior copywriter. OK, maybe you don't do that. Maybe you're just weird then.

A lovely spring day in Washington, DC finds some citizens enjoying Georgetown Waterfront Park, oblivious to President Obama out for an afternoon stroll. (Larger happens when you click.)

Here's our last visit to DC on Google Street Views.

An Xtranormal Job Search - Part II

After my interview, the people doing the hiring discuss the candidates.

An Xtranormal Job Search

I'm on a campaign to find a job by Thanksgiving.

Train of Thought Derailed

You know how it is, or maybe you don't. You're looking for something to spark an idea. Or rather, you've got an idea, but it's vague, and so you're looking for something that will spark it. Flesh it out. Complete it. But the Internet has given us short attention spans. I can't sit through a video that's over a few minutes. Got to move on. Find new stuff. Get nagging questions answered, like, "Is Tim Brando from CBS Sports related to Marlon Brando, because he sure has the fat head like Brando did?" And your team loses badly and so you want to make a cartoon of a father and son and the father will say something to the son like, "Ya know, now that the Gators suck, I expect them to lose and I don't have to beat you and Mommy so badly anymore. C'mon, let's play Black Ops." Or something. As I said, it was a vague idea. You know how it is. Or maybe you don't. And that's when I came upon this page and I loved how the words were almost poetry. And so now Stock Vector is a fictitious band and their new project "Running Black Silhouettes" is getting good press and they're adding dates to their North American tour and pretty soon some telecom will buy the rights to one of their catchy hits for a commercial and then backlash will hit fast and the hipsters who liked them early on will abandon them and before you know it even the middle schoolers think they're stupid. Then they break up and get jobs in retail and people sometimes recognize them and say, "Hey! Weren't you in Stock Vector?" And they're like, "Yeah, but that was a long time ago. Are you finding everything you need?" And then as the one-time fan walks away, finding everything she needs, the former member of Stock Vector hears the kid humming a few bars from the big hit that got them fame and money but also destroyed them. "You know how it is" was catchy as hell, and they caught hell for it.

Testimonials (From Your Family) Don't Lie

The people who know you best can be your worst critics, so when I read this, I was sorta pleased. My oldest sister, a former Washington journalist turned DC PR pro (writing runs in the family) sent me this email late last night:

Hey:

Long ago I downloaded your jetpack song from iTunes (think it was from iTunes), but never got a chance to listen to it. So I'm going
through the house doing my chores with my iPod on, and then this song comes on and I'm thinking, "That has a nice beat. I like it." Then I'm sort of dancing to it while doing my chores. And it wasn't until halfway through I realized -- it was you!

Do more.

Dana

In other words, "I was quite surprised that my little brother made a song that I like. Usually when he comes up here, I'm trying to grab the guitar from him and make him stop his raucous jamming on my acoustic, which was built for sweet melodies and sincere songs." 

So, be like my sister and dance while doing your chores. Or whistle while you work. Whatever. I'm far short of paying for a new roof with the proceeds from your purchases, so get busy.

You want a harder sell? Like, the hardest sell ever? See here.

And when you're done doing that, go "Like" the group on Facebook.

And yes, I'm doing more.

Can You Hear My Eyes Rolling?

I read someone's tweet that said something to the effect of, "I'll try to facetime you at the conference." So I went perusing the old Picasa images and found one buried in the archives from nearly four years ago that I liked and no one else did.

How 'Bout Them Cowboys?

As a Cowboy hater, I generally take satisfaction in any loss suffered by Jerry Jones and his band of inept clowns masquerading as "America's Team." But at this point, laughing at them almost feels like making fun of a blind old man pushing a walker falling down a flight of stairs.

How bad are things for the Cowboys these days? THIS is what their website looks like today. Apparently Jerry is going to start from scratch and fire everybody.

May the Blessings of the Season Be Yours

It's not too early for a corporate Christmas card, is it?

Chicken Wings Sold with Football Hands

Despite the fact that they sponsor competitive eating events, my least favorite "sport," I have to hand it (zing!) to Krystal for this ad.

They're a small player in the world of fast food, (they have 420 locations and are popular with college kids. COINCIDENCE?) but this relatively inexpensive ad is innovative. Quirky and cheap and sure, it gets old after a couple viewings, but I hear there are others in the campaign. Can't seem to locate any agency info on who did this. Would like to know.

UPDATE: Matt says in the comments that the agency for Krystal is The Johnson Group out of Chattanooga, TN, a very fine city I have visited a couple of times. And The Johnson Group is my kind of agency, not just pretending to know about social media, but totally up to speed. At left is a photo of their building from their website, followed by the street view from Google. Note the street view does not have the aging, weather-worn identifier at the top of the building. Photoshop or new paint? 


And yes, they have my resume now.

Make Him Stop!

Sorry, I'm such a sucker for 4th grade humor. (And I love dogs.)

Available at the store.

"Like" is Such a Strong Word

Working on some stuff. Been a little preoccupied. You can help end my preoccupation by going over and "liking" the page the image at left links to. Facebook won't let you have your own page name until your page has 25 Likes. I'm at 21.

So hurry, act now. Don't wait. Walk, don't run.

Radio Free Babylon is sort of the "parent company" of what I do here as well as the "holding company" of all my other projects, and you'll note that my profile image on Blogger is the company's symbol.

As it says in the company's FAQ:

What's with the squiggly symbol?
That's the schematic representation for a resistor.

Why?
Because we are resistors.

What are you resisting?
Stuff and junk.

I keep saying "company" as if it still was a company, but I long ago let my incorporation lapse. What matters these days is securing domain names (I lost track of how many I've collected), Twitter accounts (9 and counting), Posterous, Tumblr and Facebook pages. Once you have all that down, legal takes care of itself. It only occurred to me in the last few days to make a Facebook page for RFB. And now, my procrastination is your emergency. Sorry. And thanks.

Holidays are the Time for Tea!

Just in time for the Holidays! Have your own toasty-warm Tea-Party with these too-cute-for-debate mugs.

Get you one! Or a dozen!

Then get over to the Facebook page and like that thing!

Hope and Change Again

Politics Makes Strange Bedfellows and Breakfast Mates

Here's the perfect gift for the right-leaning Tea-Partier or the left-leaning Liberation Theologian on your Christmas list. It's Jesus as a politician! Because Jesus caucuses with your party!

Chances are good they won't get it or they'll find it sacrilegious. But chances are good that their politics are too.

Available now at my store.

Lady in Red, Men in Black

I long ago vowed that I would never open a Cafe Press shop. Today, I break that vow. First two designs are up, with more to come. (And likely also an intrusively loud sidebar banner on this blog that tries to guilt you into shopping.)

Crist Unleashes Too Little Too Late Banner Campaign

Charlie Crist, the man who hastily got married in an effort to disspell rumors that he was gay so that John McCain would consider him for his running mate before McCain so graciously gave America Sarah Palin, is in a futile battle with Marco Rubio, the Tea-Party favorite predicted to win a Senate seat for Florida today. Crist has been relatively silent in the ad department, while Rubio saturated the airwaves. Now Crist appears in banners, the day of the election, with these silly ads that attempt to make Rubio look like Fidel Castro and Che Guevara's best friend. Or at least make him look like some third-world terrorist and fugitive. All shadowy and blue, with disjointed font that suggests chaos. He's "too extreme." Vote for the tan white man. Kendrick Meek, my early favorite, is now a distant third. 

Crist, by nearly every account, is a career opportunist, always looking for the next rung on the ladder that will take him to his ultimate goal, his own private tanning bed in the Oval Office. After he loses today, I wonder what a guy who has spent his entire life in public office looking for the next opportunity is going to do. Reality show? Game-show host? "Who Wants to Be a Politician?" I wouldn't put it past him.

I'll head up to the polls at lunch and cast my worthless vote. I will ride my bike there. In flip-flops and shorts. Our polling station is the local Baptist church, and it is always a strange feeling to observe the old, Conservative white people who staff the polls observing me. And I know what they're thinking. But they are wrong. I am an independent. But if you ride your bike to the polling station in flip-flops in this neighborhood, you're clearly voting one way. Maybe I'll spray-paint the red Anarchy symbol on an old t-shirt just to freak them out a little more.

Crossposted to Radio Free Babylon.

At the Intersection of Entertainment and Politics

Or: "Damn! This is a Tough Job Market."

Walt Disney World just hired a new Senior Vice President of Public Affairs and Worldwide Government and Industry Relations.

That's quite a title. In practice, the function of the position will be to issue statements on behalf of the corporation that the person who claimed to have been molested by an employee dressed as Goofy has since changed his/her tune. Or to coordinate with local law enforcement and prosecutors to quickly sweep under the rug any other nastiness that might give our Mighty Mouse a bad image. Or to secure a renewal of Disney's "no-fly zone" policy long ago granted by the FAA. Disney owns this town, and any potential dirt the press can dig up is always very quickly silenced by the efficient workings of Disney's highly-connected machine. Disney is the mafia and everyone knows it. They have the money, they make the jobs, they buy the influence.

In my crazy day-to-day applications to all positions that I think I might even be remotely qualified to perform, I may have submitted a resume to Disney for this job. In hindsight that was silly, but as they say, "you never know." Well, I lost out to Brian Besanceney. Brian has a resume that trumps the hell out of mine and all others.

From the press release issued by Disney:

"Besanceney has been with The Walt Disney Co. since February 2009 as vice president of public affairs for business development, and will retain those duties. Prior to joining Disney, he served as deputy chief of staff to former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and assistant secretary of public affairs for the U.S. Department of Homeland Security and deputy communications director at the White House."

That makes total sense, since Disney is the de facto fourth branch of power in this country.

Pick Your Poison

If you're a Fox Nut or an MSNBC Drone, this is your button today.

NFL Stats Are Stupid

Usually...

But I picked up on one yesterday that no one is talking about - yet.

Of the four road teams posting victories yesterday, three of those teams were from Florida. This marks the first time that all three Florida teams won on the road on the same day that all three California teams won at home, on a Halloween, in a year divisible by 10.