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mas grande

Original photo by Russell Lee for the Farm Security Administration, 1938. From the always fascinating Shorpy.com.

Lincoln Takes His Facebook Profile Picture

In the bathroom mirror, no doubt.

size matters

Try a Little Harder

If you're going to engage, engage with at least a modest hint of enthusiasm.

(Twitterers know what I'm talking about...)

The t-shirt is an original Jetpacks Production, but I expect it will be stolen and available at a cafepress store very soon.

Formal Friday

A Morality Play for Salespeople.
Wait: Morality? Sales?
Nevermind.
OK, it's just a skit that fell out of my head after I saw this picture.

JANE

I just love Formal Fridays. They make me feel pretty.

JIM

At the risk of creating an HR incident, you are always pretty, Jane, Formal Friday or not.

JANE

(Laughing) Oh, Jim, you're so funny.

JIM

I'm not trying to be funny. You're totally hot. Always.

JANE

Let's pretend you're being funny then, OK? That's sure a handsome metal desk.

JIM

Thanks. Wanna lay on it? Super comfortable.

JANE

Uh....I thank you, but no. Where's your chair?

JIM

Well, I don't like to sit on Formal Fridays 'cause it wrinkles my tux, so I stick the chair in the closet. But that is one handsome metal desk, huh?

JANE

Certainly.

JIM

Handsome handsome.

JANE

Indeed.

JIM

Am I handsome?

JANE

Jim.

JIM

Yes, Jane?

JANE

We are coworkers. Our relationship is professional.

JIM

I know. But I'm in sales. I can't stop trying.

JANE

So, I am just a prospect to you? A potential "sale"?

JIM

Look, if I make 30 calls on my avocado phone over there and three say "yes," then the effort was worth it.

JANE

I see. And how many "calls" have you made today besides the one you're working right now?

JIM

You sure smell pretty.

JANE

You're disgusting.

JIM

Disgusting in a roguish, rakish way? Like a pirate?

JANE

No. Like a pig disgusting.

JIM

You dig me, I can tell.

JANE

No, I don't.

JIM

No means yes.

JANE

No. No means no.

JIM

And today's opposite day.

JANE

No, it's Formal Friday. And I bid you good day, sir.

[Jane exits, stage right]

JIM

I sooo almost had her.

Image via Plan 59

There's Nothing Like a Surly Scottish Clog

I saw this local spot not long ago and was humored by the concept. How do you decide to give a clogged drain a Scottish accent a la Mike Myers? How do you decide to have the drain insulting the homeowner as a "freakin' hippie"? How do you decide to have the Scottish clog encouraging the homeowner to continue scratching his itch, calling her "sweetheart"? He's a stubborn, randy drain with an attitude. When you're selling local drain clearing, you have to think creatively. These people did. There are no happy men in trucks pulling up to the curb with a plumber's toolbox, smiling under sunny skies. All clichés avoided and a bathroom as the shoot location.



I emailed the owner of Farmers Drains a couple weeks ago asking if I could post his commercial. I inadvertently insulted him by calling the commercial "low budget," at which point he told me not to post anything about his business. He misunderstood my appreciation for his promotion and I forgot that any amount spent on production and air time for a small business is money that is hard to part with, especially in this climate. Since he now has an account on YouTube, I think I'm safe to share his work. I think it's also a safe bet that people in need of a rooter service are going to remember the name "Farmers" and the figure of $99, thanks to this spot.

Copyright Infringement Karma

A reader tells me that an old post of mine called Tweet Your Breakfast is #2 on Reddit right now via Twitpic. The best part? I don't get any credit. Maybe my future comics will carry some sort of watermark. My 15 minutes of internet fame are almost over and I didn't even get to enjoy them, much less monetize them.

But I guess it serves me right since I "borrowed" the picture from Getty Images to begin with.

Here it is again.

Bigness

Dyslexic Seafood Dining Options

Let's eat at that place that has the fish skeleton in the logo!

I Am a Phoenix

If you get around the webosphere with any regularity, you've likely seen this recent banner campaign from the University of Phoenix (school motto: "No serious HR manager even gives us a second look") wherein proud students declare that they are "a Phoenix."

Mr. Phoenix has something to say about that.

Stop It, Already

See here? You can do the shiny logo reflection in MS Word now. That means it's way played. So you can stop doing it on all of your logo designs and websites. Please.

Meet Your New King

This is Mark Zuckerberg, boy genius and Emperor of Facebookistan. Recently he decreed that henceforth throughout his realm, everything you had was to be brought to his throne. There was much outcry throughout the land upon the Emperor's announcement, and so the Emperor, in his benevolence and wisdom, has sought to explain to the peasants just what exactly he meant by, "You own nothing and everything is mine!"

From the pen of one of the court scribes of His Excellence, Zuckerberg:

More than 175 million people use Facebook. If it were a country, it would be the sixth most populated country in the world. Our terms aren't just a document that protect our rights; it's the governing document for how the service is used by everyone across the world. Given its importance, we need to make sure the terms reflect the principles and values of the people using the service.

He is asking for your help, citizens, in crafting the new, revised Facebook Bill of Rights and Responsibilities.

I don't think I need to read much more. Here we have a man whose exploding business has exploded his head. In his mind, he runs a country now.

I'm about to become a Facebook ex-pat.

Sexual Harrassment: It Works Both Ways

In your dreams, dudes.

The lawyer suggests that you tell "the temptress" to stop calling you "strong" and to stop seeking you out on the warehouse floor in her tight leather skirt. It's really bothersome. Classic early 90s production and slinky music in this CYA film apparently written as comedy.

Mayonnaise is Looking for Fans on Facebook

Yes it is.

Donna Wood of Switzerland writes on Hellmann's wall:

"Hellmans is the best, I eat mayo with everything, so does my son and so does my mum, we are addicted!!! lol!

Dallas Edwards of Australia writes:

Oh my gosh! i just tried it tonight and there is no way in hell im going back to the other crap i've been eating!
YUMM!

Jonathan Trackwell of Los Angeles says simply:

I love you Hellmann's.

There is a group on Facebook that wants to get mayo into McDonald's in the UK.

Who knows how much of that is seeded by Hellmann's? I'm not sure it really matters anymore. The fact remains: it's a weird world out there for brands.

Hellmann's was used last night at my house. I may as well jump on the UGC bandwagon now.

supersize.

Lincoln Couldn't Cut It

Biggest

This comic was inspired by an actual event that took place yesterday: I foolishly believed the advertising Coke has been using to sell Coke Zero. I tried a Coke Zero, expecting it to taste like real Coke. It did not. At all.

Long Lincoln Weekend

"What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself."
- A. Lincoln

bigger

Bite Me

Hail Nancy, Full of Grace

This woman needs to be stopped. I have an idea: don't watch her show. If you accidentally come across it, quickly turn away lest her snake-hair turn you to stone.

Even her own production crew are not fans, as evidenced by this old footage of them joyfully undermining her broadcast.



Since that show, way back in the Spring of '07, Nancy has devolved into an even worse caricature of herself. But as long as CNN can get big-name sponsors to buy time on her show, she is not going anywhere.

Find a Real One on eBay for Less

"Some things just get cooler with age," reads the website. "They develop an unmistakable mojo over time that makes them look cooler and feel even more comfortable than when they were new," they go on to philosophize.

This is forgivable when it happens with jeans. Nothing screams "brand new pants" like some 501s that have never seen a washing machine. But I can't forgive this in a line of new guitars. From Fender no less.

These are not "road worn" instruments. They are new and designed to look road worn. Or as Fender puts it, they have "a killer aged design aesthetic." Smells like bullshit. But surely there is a market for these. No self-respecting wannabe rocker worth his rocks in rock would be caught rockin' a non-rock axe, right? A rocker's gotta look like a rocker, and when it comes to rockin', Fender knows how to make you look your rockin' best. Just ask Springsteen, toting around that stage prop he calls a guitar.

So now, young poseurs, you can look the part right down to your brand new "distressed" guitar from Fender. Make sure you aren't wearing brand new jeans.

Here's the Joe Strummer model.

So wrong.

In the Future, Google Will Declare the Holidays

Oh, those hipster Googalians. always changing their logo and making you hover over it to see the alt tag because you didn't recognize by the funky coolness that today was Share Water with a Third-Worlder Day, or the anniversary of some surrealist's death, or International Think Positively Day or whatever. (Here are all of the Google logo changes for 2008.)

And of all the birthdays Google might've honored today, from Christina Ricci to Franco Zeffirelli to Adolf van Egmond (duke of Gelre/earl of Zutphen), they went with Charles "Chuck" Darwin, the famed test pilot and space pioneer who died in a fiery crash off the coast of the Galápagos Islands. Not even a nod to the president everyone thinks was a god all of a sudden, Abraham "Cro-Magnon" Lincoln, whose personal love for his country we all celebrate every year on February 14^th with flowers, candy, teddy bears and sexy lingerie.

Google kids, you are too hip for me.

Testing, Testing - Sibilance - Testing

Pay me no mind. I am playing with RSS and Twitter. Trying to get right with the community and stop spamming them with shameless plugs for my own stuff.

In an effort to streamline the multiple channels that I offer, I had hoped to maximize the user experience by facilitating a symbiotic relationship, allowing a single input to multiply by three.

Little did I know, the Twitter community finds this spam-like and offensive.

And....Go Dog, Go!

You're a Great American

Make your own at Obamiconme.

Adobe® - Clay - Same Difference

Put down your fancy electronic crayons and scissors, boys and girls. Watch some old school claymation. This is from 1953 and was the forerunner to "Gumby," created by the same guy.

Marketing Your Church to an Ever-Moving Target

How to Get Free, Constant Exposure!
Striking While The Iron's Hot!
Making the Most of a Media Circus!

I'm sure they've created their talking points over at First Baptist Church of Orlando, justifying why helicopters, news trucks and vans and thousands of people who never knew Caylee Anthony or her family are gathering in the church for a PUBLIC "memorial service" orchestrated by the grandmother of the slain toddler.

If you're unfamiliar with the case, good for you. Try to stay that way. It's a sordid tale given way too much press by a ghoulish media, headed by Chief Demon Nancy Grace, who fanned the flames nightly in a self-righteous roar, boosting her ratings. The tragic tale was lapped up by a sick segment of society that now believes they knew this little girl.

And in an effort to appear compassionate, along comes this church, portraying itself as a gracious and welcoming place for "healing and hope" for our community as we "move past this ordeal and find closure."

And you're welcome to come back this Sunday!


And how about this for some sick advertising over at WESH news? Another little girl goes missing, and be sure to watch LIVE COVERAGE of the memorial!

I Don't Disagree. In Fact, I'm Mostly in Agreeance.

Main Entry: agreeance
Part of Speech: n
Definition: the act of agreeing
Example: Usage of the site constitutes agreeance with these terms.
Usage: considered obsolete and a bastardization of 'agreement'

Don't be a bastard.

Taken (for an Implausible Ride)

Sometimes you just want to see a movie. And sometimes the showtimes and your schedule only allow you to see one of two. You don't want to see some throwaway Steve Martin crap, so you go with Liam Neeson. He used to be a Jedi Knight, so it should be OK.

A few things wrong with the Liam Neeson film "Taken."

• Overt attempts to fan racial hatred. I now look at all Albanians with deep suspicion. And French people. And anyone who has the word "Sheik" in front of their name.
• The girl playing Neeson's daughter. She is supposed to be 17, but bounces around like a 6-year old in every scene, spastic, uncoordinated and way overdoing the "Daddy's little girl" thing.
• Mr. Neeson's hair. It is that odd mixture of chocolate and rust that is not found in nature. Why is it that men, even rich men with professional hair and make-up artists, can't get a good dye-job? At one point in the film, Liam's temples are grey, then they go back to Hershey's Special Dark in the next scene.
• The idea that two 17-year-old girls are going to follow U2 around Europe for a summer is so ridiculous it is laughable. U2? Seriously? Does ANY 17-year old girl give two shits about U2? I'll bet the teenage daughters of the members of U2 don't even listen to U2.
• The car chases and fight scenes are shot in that super-close, rapid-cut, blurred-out way that makes the action impossible to follow. All the director wants you to understand is that Liam is kicking asses and they were on a tight budget.
• Mr. Neeson's endless supply of costumes, fake IDs, weapons and whatnot is very extensive for a guy who packed some cash and a passport as he raced out of his dingy and sad divorced dad apartment in LA.
• After dispatching everyone on the Sheik's luxury barge at the end, Liam and his daughter reunite in a teary, touching embrace as the pilotless barge continues to sail smoothly down the Seine.
  

I won't give away the ending, but OK, I just did. Here's more wrap-up: As you now know, Neeson gets his daughter back from the evil slave-trading Albanians and earns the respect and gratitude of his hateful ex-wife who married some rich dick who owns all kinds of stuff. He also takes his daughter (who wants to be a singer) to meet "Sheerah," a pop diva whom Liam rescued early in the film from some knife-wielding psycho backstage. You see, Liam was hired by his old CIA pals to provide security, even though Sheerah already had her own Uzi-wielding security force.

"Taken" - Coming to DVD by the end of the week.

Much Abuzz About Nothing

Coffee must feel really cheated right now. It was once the only (legal) thing we ingested to give us a little kick start. Now we have energy drinks, energy shots, energy pills and thanks to a really dumb idea over at Nestlé, we also have Butterfinger Buzz, "with as much caffeine as the leading energy drink."
Here's Butterfinger's stupid microsite promoting the product, with a bunch of idiots getting their heads shaved (or "buzzed!" - get it?) so they can paint the Butterfinger Buzz logo on their skulls. Are you a fan of Butterfinger Buzz on Facebook yet? Will you attend the Butterfinger Buzz Event in NYC this Thursday and get your head shaved? And be sure to follow Butterfinger Buzz on Twitter!!!

And don't forget the Butterfinger Comedy Network, a place for doomed comedians to hone their skills at this dying performing art.

April 1^st of last year saw the fake relaunch of Butterfinger as just "The Finger." Ha-ha! April Fool's! We're so funny.

A candy bar loaded with caffeine. F-ing genius! "Screw you, coffee! I can get the same feeling from this candy bar that also has 460 calories!"

All of this effort is being put forth for a product that is "limited - while supplies last." A gimmick for the sake of being gimmicky. Buzz. Get people talking. Get them to shave their heads and sport your logo.

You are trying way too hard, Nestlé. It's a candy bar, not a lifestyle.

Code Blue for Polaroid

At our house, we watch "House." Actually, I provide the running, snide commentary as we watch it, much to the annoyance of the others who are trying to enjoy it. EVERY SINGLE EPISODE OF HOUSE starts with someone collapsing. Throughout the next 45 minutes, House and his crew of genius doctors-in-training proceed to exhaust every possible remedy as they change the diagnosis six times, torturing and often killing the patient briefly. Toward the end, as House is talking to someone about a sub-plot that is completely unrelated to the mysterious case of the collapsing, dying patient, he stops in mid-sentence with a puzzled gleam in his eye. Something he has just said holds the answer to the mystery. He then rushes off to order the magic surgery/drug/treatment that will end the baffling case. (With animated body inner-workings diagrams coinciding with House's narration of the simple diagnosis to his crew.) Then he leaves the building, lonely, hurting and still angry, but ever-so-slightly buoyed as some bluesy piano or guitar follows him into the rain/wind/snow/dark of night.

Anyway, here's Hugh Laurie (who does an excellent job of disguising his English origins on the show) looking super-80s in an old commercial for Polaroid, a dying patient.

Seriously, Man, You and Me, We're Done Professionally

Another Viral Example Brands Can't Duplicate

Take something topical, like say, a spoiled actor screaming at length at a production guy for "trashing my scene" and set the audio to dance music. Instant hit. 2 million views on YouTube in a matter of days, with many of those viewers following the link to the MySpace page of RevoLucian, a producer from LA, (real name: Lucian Piane) who is making a name for himself by taking the captured, candid audio moments of celebrities and turning them into lyrics for his mixes. He's skewered Bill O'Reilly, Barbara Streisand, Sarah Palin and the "Don't Taze Me Bro" guy.

RevoLucian is not signed to a label, but everyone loves his stuff now. He says he's producing RuPaul's new CD, but that's not much of a calling card. Being able to say, "I created the Christian Bale Dance Remix" however, should open a few doors.

Why is Mr. Piane's Bale remix a hit? It's topical, for one. It's also funny and smart. And it actually happened. It's Batman (fucking) losing it. And now it's a dance remix. I can see this song being played in clubs, with the main lyric, "What don't you fuckin' understand?" being shouted out on the dance floor. Piane's viral is now a resume maker.

Bale ranted and Piane struck while the topic was hot. Now he's got the momentum to take his work (his "brand" if you will) to loftier places. But few people care to see what a brand's professional production team has deemed "viral." Ray Ban got some views for their glasses catching guys, but that video got as much negative press for trying too hard and being smug as it did for being clever.

I stand by the maxim: Good viral just happens.

What Do You Get When You Cross a Youth Hostel with a W Hotel?

This place. Very simple, very cool. A block from the ocean in South Beach. With windows that actually open!

In a shameless, "we strive to be hip" way, they also offer the hotel as a production location.


My colleagues are very picky when it comes to sleep comfort, however, so we will unfortunately not be using this place again. They were not enamored of the stylish and firm platform beds nor did they enjoy the invigorating din of late-night revelers and traffic on the street below.

Back to the damn Hampton Inn.

Accidental Email Poetry

I received an email this morning from our accountant/interior designer, who is purchasing chairs for my office. After a few exchanges, the line breaks became random, resulting in this:



I just asked Sheri if your space could hold two
chairs, would she be good with purchasing two

and she said, "see what he prefers". Personally, I
think two would look better, but, let me know what

you think.



I'm hearing bongos and snapping fingers...man.

I Guess It's Time To Sell T-Shirts

Teri, a reader who handles interactive strategy at an agency in Michigan, has posted some of my comics on her cube wall without my permission; the very same comics that are based on a picture I stole from Getty Images without permission. I have chosen not to pursue legal action against Teri, since she also posts a picture of Robert Plant with the caption, "Does anyone remember Friendster?"

Le Large

A Nation of Immigrants

Hey, Hannity! They barely speak English, but they love their country.

Patriotism is alive in one of the most neglected yet colorful areas of Miami. This in-progress American mural graces a wall in Little Haiti.

mas grande

I'm hoping the artist eventually puts some lapels on that Mister Rogers sweater Obama's wearing, turning it into a proper jacket.

Stimulus Maximus

If you search Amtrak Sucks on Google, this blog comes in first place. Here is one of the most popular landing pages on this blog, as that is a search term many people seem to identify with. (Here are all of my Amtrak related posts.)

Early on, I offered the new President my services as Transportation Secretary, but he played the coy game, not returning my emails, acting all aloof, finally going with some guy from Illinois to whom he probably owes a favor. I expect Ray LaHood (which is Lebanese for "Ray is a Hoodlum") to do nothing as Transportation Secretary, just like every other Transportation Secretary before him. If I were Ray right now, I'd be sending Barry emails, threatening to make public those pictures of the two of them doing bong hits in Chicago if he doesn't kick in a couple billion to fix Amtrak.

If you caught a glimpse of Obama's pre-inaugural train trip from Philly to DC, you might've noticed a very shiny Amtrak train, looking completely unlike any other Amtrak train you've ever seen, as they are usually covered in diesel scum and haven't been washed in years. His train was also on time, which was very odd, as punctuality is a concept Amtrak holds as relative.

Can we build a better rail system in America, people? Yes We Can. And if we can't, we can at least have this train.

Plus, this heirloom-quality Obama memorabilia really runs and illuminates with headlights and inner compartment lights. Take a historic ride and display your American pride. Also makes a stunning Obama themed gift. Order now!

Previously in "Expensive Obama Gifts You Can't Afford":

All Aboard the (Very Expensive) Hope Train

Spellcheck, Damnit!

Click to proofread

You'd figure if you're going to outfit a fleet of service trucks with vinyl lettering, you might at least....never mind.

Snapped on the way into work in illiterate Orlando.

Previously in "Spellchecker."

Denny's: It's Not Just For Drunk College Kids Anymore

Denny's wants to remind people that this is what breakfast is supposed to look like. It's not a muffin from Starbuck's. It's not a pair of greasy taquitos from 7-11. It's not a jelly-filled donut from Dunkin'. It's not a Pop-Tart, good as Pop-Tarts are. It's not last night's pizza, renamed "Italian Cheese Toast" so that you feel better about being a loser.

And Denny's wants to remind you that breakfast is a meal, the kind you sit down for, with a fork and everything. This is your grandpa's breakfast and it's cool again. Or should be. This is a farm breakfast, the kind that gets you fueled up and ready for a hard day of work sitting at your computer searching YouTube. So won't you please come into Dennys and at least give it a try?

Denny's will offer this breakfast free to everyone tomorrow from 6 am to 2 pm. That is a major promotion, but it's not really a gamble. Under the unspoken guise of "We're just looking out for you in these tough economic times" is a solid strategy. You'll also order coffee and juice and the cost of the meal will be covered. Denny's thinks you'll say to yourself, "Damn. Now that was a breakfast," and they hope you'll come back again.

It's not cool to like Denny's among a certain set. Denny's is considered white-trash and low-brow, where some junkie-cook with hepatitis is going to spit in your food and a surly, old, fat lady named Mabel will refill your coffee with a splash that suggests she once had a kid who looked like you and she's glad that kid is gone.

I don't mind a Denny's. I haven't been to one in a long time, but Denny's doesn't bother me. It's nice to know that if I want a classic breakfast at 11 pm on Christmas night, Denny's will serve it up. I hope their promotion tomorrow is a success and that people who've been eating on the run will rediscover the pleasure of making time for a morning meal. Sadly, what I think will happen is that Denny's will be overrun with bargain hunting vagabonds and bag ladies, scaring off the potential new customers as they drive by.

Because You Wanted to See This Again

I can't escape Muffin Top Woman. She's all over the web these days, selling something.


Leave me alone, Muffin Top Woman.

Your Refuge From Super Bowl Ad Analysis

Bigness

This is that time of year when our colleagues in Europe, South America, Asia and everywhere else say to each other, "Fucking Americans. They think the Super Bowl stops the world and is the end-all showcase of good stuff. I don't know about you guys, but I got work to do." The more indignant of the group say, "We must resist the strident dogma and imperialistic designs of the American advertising culture! Rise up, brothers! Fight!"

It's now beyond stupid. Sean Hannity was previewing Super Bowl ads on his show and telling us which ones are good.

There is more than enough Super Bowl ad review, tweeting and blogging going on without me weighing in as well to give you one more OPINION on what worked and what didn't. Or what will work, since many of the ads are now pre-screening at your favorite ad blog right now.

I will watch the game. I will watch the commercials. I will not update my Facebook status with "Coke ad very funny!" nor will I be live-blogging the spots. I won't join in the pointless debate about who made best use of their $300 zillion 30-second buy.

Who cares? And what do any of us know? I'm just going to enjoy the show, the spectacle, the joke that is now the battle for the Vince Lombardi Trophy. I will also attempt to stomach the halftime show, with God's gift to songwriting weighing in on how to fix America. We sit at your feet, Bruce Almighty, awaiting your instructions. What? Love one another? You are such a genius! (That's just my opinion.)

If you are not the Super Bowl watching type and want to get away to see a movie in a likely-empty theater, I suggest Gran Torino. Saw it yesterday afternoon. It's Eastwood as we like him: Badass. Even at 78, the guy is cool. I know the movie got ripped by many critics who thought it was "ham-fisted" and telegraphed, but those are just opinions from critics. You'll like it or you won't. Just like Super Bowl ads. In this instant-analysis social media era, we're all nothing more than a smörgåsbord of critics and pundits. You've got your followers and you've got the ones you follow.

But it's a damned ugly car...if you ask me.

Now This is Adverrtising

Advertising used to be a black art. It required subtlety and innuendo, vague nudging and then gentle calls to action. Whispers and suggestions. Before you knew it, you're at a bar saying, "Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken." But we're too jaded and cynical for most of those methods now. Sure, lingerie and exotic cars can still be sold that way, but now we want you to make us laugh while you're selling your stuff. Baby e-trade is a good example.

Below, the self-mocking, self-aware ad reaches its high point. Nothing hidden here. No attempt to be subtle. Just product, in your face, done by a couple of established sketch comedians using one of their well-known sketches as the vehicle. From SNL last night, Will Forte and Kristen Wigg in "MacGruber" selling Pepsi with the real MacGyver, Richard Dean Anderson.

The first one establishes the joke as a product placement.



The product placement gets more blatant.



Then, the over-the-top payoff.



Congratulations to Pepsi and their new agency, TBWA/Chiat/Day for pulling off this stunt. You think it's just another episode of MacGruber as they go into the commercial break, then you are sucked in by the ruse and you don't even care. It's comedy to sell Pepsi. And they even talked MacGyver out of retirement for the series. I can forgive that stupid logo change now.

But I'm a Coke man. As much as I admire this work, I'm not switching unless the restaurant I'm in only offers Pepsi. Honestly, my taste buds aren't so refined that I could actually tell much difference, but if I'm standing in front of two vending machines selling competing soft drinks, I'm probably going for the Coke. It's just a loyalty thing they conditioned me into believing years ago. If Pepsi wants to buy away my loyalty, we can talk.